Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

I’m terrified of escalators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

I like my messages, how I like my nuts – MIXED.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying seems to be working.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Y’all aren’t taking beautiful women to jazz clubs anymore, and that’s the problem.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

People pleasers aren’t kind. They’re afraid.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,300

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Reddit:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Going viral on X:

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

Trending via Telegram:

Imagine giving someone your heart at Christmas, but the very next day they give it away. Haha, would feel so stupid.

Trending via Twitch:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Freshly posted on Slack:

The Slow and the Furious: me navigating a shopping cart through a grocery store filled with morons.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

Making waves on Telegram:

They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

Breaking via Twitch:

Santa punched a hole in my wall because I left him soy milk.

Making waves on X:

Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

Just shared via Threads:

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

Is ChatGPT my father-in-law because it keeps making stuff up and passing it off as fact?

3 weeks ago

Playful joke about ChatGPT acting like a mischievous father-in-law with fabricated facts.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Guess I should start calling it DadGPT! 😂👨‍💼🤦‍♂️"

ChatGPT, fact, family, father-in-law, humor, jokes, keeps, making, making stuff up, passing, stuff, technology

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Adulting is only fun when you have the funds.

3 weeks ago

adulting, financial, fun, funds, humor, joke, life, money, only, responsibility
Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

1 month ago

absurdity, asking, Christmas, holiday, humor, joke, nudes, request, Santa
I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

4 weeks ago

12, age, drink, furious, humor, i, joke, old, parents, whiskey, year
Word on the street is that the fire in your heart is out.

3 weeks ago

breakup, emotion, fire, heart, humor, joke, relationship, rumor, sarcasm, street, word
Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

1 month ago

always, beach, best, chance, clumsiness, flip, flip flop, flop, fun, funny moment, humor, laughter, moment, outdoor, outdoor fun, own, someone, summer, trip
I love Queen and David Bowie, but why did they steal that riff from Vanilla Ice?

1 month ago

bowie, culture, david, David Bowie, humor, i, ice, love, music, musician, parody, pop, pop culture, queen, riff, song, steal, vanilla, Vanilla Ice, why

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Reddit this month:

On the upside, my kids are helping with the dishes. On the downside, my kids are helping with the dishes.

56 shares on YouTube this month:

Who needs an alarm clock when you have a bladder.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

I swear some songs have background noises of your mum shouting your name from downstairs.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

100 shares on Messenger this month:

Adulthood will turn Gmail into part of your social media routine.

81 shares on Twitch this month:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

69 shares on X this month:

My son was praying for “everybody in the world.” If you suddenly start experiencing good fortune, you’re welcome.

71 shares on X this month:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Haircuts should be covered by insurance.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

That gap in my resume is from when I was lost at sea.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t worry, nobody noticed the weird thing you did. They’re too busy with the weird thing you said.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

McDonald’s needs a 3rd window so you can trade in all the wrong stuff they gave you.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Babe, would it kill you to meow back?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

Our parents used to drop us off at school with no water bottle, no phone and no snacks, yet somehow we survived.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Will mosquitoes ever develop a pizza obsession and end their pursuit of human blood?

Just landed via Telegram:

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

Spreading quickly via X:

Gender is a just a scam made by big bathroom companies to sell more bathrooms.

Just landed via Messenger:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

Just landed via Slack:

I hate to break it to you, guys, but my husband says you’re not real. He just called you my imaginary friends.

Seen just now on Slack:

Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

Seen just now on YouTube:

Don’t think of it as losing followers, think of it as frustrating bots to the point they go away.

Just landed via Snapchat:

The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Is ChatGPT my father-in-law because it keeps making stuff up and passing it off as fact?

Keep the laugh going 😂

Adulting is only fun when you have the funds.

Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Word on the street is that the fire in your heart is out.

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

I love Queen and David Bowie, but why did they steal that riff from Vanilla Ice?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨