My dad wasn’t absent or present; he was a secret third thing. Posted onFeb 1, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Sounds like you've unlocked the DLC character of parenting 🤔🕵️♂️✨ Related funny posts 😂 Making friends as an adult is wild because there’s so much lore to catch up on. You’ll be 3 years in and still get random drops like, ‘Oh, by the way, I used to be married.’ I have lived way too many lives for people to think they know everything about me. My tween would like you to know I ruined his life when I told him to stop being super sus and cringe and be more lit yo. Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner. It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.