Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

“I’ve had cigarettes that were better than entire years of my life.”

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

So I just keep making dinner? Every night of my life? For forever?

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

If you’re bored when you’re alone, obviously you’re in bad company.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Maybe God will gift me a boyfriend for my birthday this year.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Oh, I’m so excited to wear Uggs, beanies, and oversized sweaters. I can feel fall creeping up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,415

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

Staring sadly at the empty ice cream bowl that’s too small for licking.

Spotted on X:

Pinterest is so therapeutic. There’s no drama, no one to argue with. Just pretty pictures.

Going viral on TikTok:

Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.

Breaking via WeChat:

Another day of explaining to mom that New York is big and the footage she saw wasn’t shot on my street.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m gonna build a pirate ship and sail the high seas. Who’s coming with?

Shared recently on Instagram:

I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

A flat stomach is one of the best accessories.

Broadcasted on X:

Building a snowman so I can punch it in the face.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

So we have actual fact checkers who know all the facts? Why not create a TV channel where they just give us the facts? We could call it the News.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Shout out to Yamaha for being like, “Here’s a cool motorcycle. Also, here’s a cool piano.”

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Arguing with Grok: the new extreme sport for when you can't find Wi-Fi in the deep woods. 🤔🦖💬

answer, arguing, argument, asking, conservative, favorite, genre, give, grok, guy, humor, likes, question, true, tweet

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you sit down to play a game of chess and your opponent punches you in the face, you’re not going to prevail by getting better at chess.

0

3 months ago

better, chess, conflict, face, game, getting, going, humor, opponent, play, response, sit, strategy, unexpected, unexpected response, violence
Hi there, I very much look forward to letting you down.

0

5 months ago

disappointment, expectation, forward, greeting, hi, humor, i, letting, much, sarcasm
I’d log off, but I get so tired of hearing myself talk.

0

2 months ago

hearing, humor, i, ID, log, log off, myself, sarcasm, self, self-talk, talk, tired
I hate how what would have been a parody is now reality.

0

2 months ago

comedy, frustration, hate, humor, i, irony, parody, reality, satire
Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

0

2 months ago

alone, attention, everyone, humor, i, leave, looks, me, only, self-deprecation, thing, wants
They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

0

2 months ago

education, genius, growth, humor, irony, learn, making, mistake

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Messenger this month:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

Just saw onto the sidelines, they literally have enough footballs for all the players, they’re making them fight over that one for no reason.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

I forgot to get milk, so Santa has a cup of Pepsi Max.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Follow your dreams – ideally in a field that will still require humans when you graduate.

77 shares on Twitch this month:

wearing no bra and oversized clothes is self-care at its finest

30 shares on LinkedIn this month:

An agenda reveal party, where I surprise everyone with all the things I hope to accomplish this weekend.

95 shares on X this month:

This is actually worse than Biff Tennan’s future.

83 shares on X this month:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Spent 20 minutes training ChatGPT to write the perfect anniversary note for my wife, so don’t try to tell me I’m not romantic.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, Guantanamo Bay.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Narcissus fell in love with his own image, but was immediately annoyed at how it always tried to talk while he was talking.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

WFH is so great until you realize you’ve walked about 17 steps all day.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Slack:

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Going viral on X:

The iPhone alarm is so effective that you wake up before it goes off, so you don’t have to listen to such an unbearable noise.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Just landed via Discord:

My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I’m camping, I won’t be covered.

Going viral on Threads:

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

Breaking via Slack:

I’m only awake because my coffee needs me.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

Shared recently on Discord:

You learn a lot about someone when you marry them. For example, I learned I should have married someone else.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

There’ll be a time someone will convince you to watch Game of Thrones. It is very important that you listen to them and watch.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If you sit down to play a game of chess and your opponent punches you in the face, you’re not going to prevail by getting better at chess.

Hi there, I very much look forward to letting you down.

I’d log off, but I get so tired of hearing myself talk.

I hate how what would have been a parody is now reality.

Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨