Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Dear food, either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

All kids are born with a sixth sense that lets them know the absolute worst time to ask for something.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Out of sheer boredom, I opened the front door and rang the doorbell. I was so happy.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Tolerate the lactose already, you heathen.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

A man will beg you to take him back just to act right for 5 days and 24 min.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

It’s messed up how us humans have to obey all these laws while bears get to eat whoever they want.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,699

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

Breaking via Instagram:

Icarus loved hot wings.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.

Live now on LinkedIn:

The umbrella was going to be called brella, but the inventor hesitated.

Making waves on Pinterest:

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Making waves on Messenger:

Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

Just landed via Slack:

Having a job is cool, but everyday? Come on!

Shared recently on Threads:

Welcome to your 40s: that “teenager”over there is actually 27.

Breaking via Twitch:

I’m bringing back “hold your horses” and nobody can stop me.

Not gonna lie, to this day, I don’t know the difference between gray and grey, I just wing it.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Gray or grey, I'm just waiting for 'em to make up their mind so I can stop color-coding chaos 😂🎨🖍️

casual, casual language, color, confusion, day, difference, gray, grey, honesty, humor, i, just, know, language, lie, spelling, wing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

0

2 months ago

appetite, feel, food, great, humor, hungry, irony, meal, soup, still, want
If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

0

2 months ago

back, coffee, companionship, friend, humor, let, love, loyalty, meant, meant to be, relationship
How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

0

2 months ago

advice, date, dating, dating advice, honesty, humor, idiot, know, let, love, new, new love, relationship, should, soon
Shazam but for random noises outside.

0

2 months ago

creativity, humor, noise, outside, random, random noise, Shazam, sound, superhero
Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, cycle, daily, daily routine, grocery, humor, just, life, routine, shopping, store
Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

0

2 months ago

cleanliness, cooking, dirt, eating, exactly, figure, food, humor, much, mushroom, okay, preferences, washing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

94 shares on Reddit this month:

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

21 shares on TikTok this month:

I think my wife has got early Alzheimer’s. Every day she tells me that she has no idea what she first saw in me.

73 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m literally overstimulated with life. I need to scream on top of a mountain.

13 shares on WeChat this month:

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

85 shares on TikTok this month:

I hate when someone on a magazine cover stares at me while I eat.

41 shares on YouTube this month:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

38 shares on Messenger this month:

Your birthday as an adult mainly consists of texting back ‘Thanks!’ to people you haven’t talked to in 5 years.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Sometimes I’ll drink a ginger ale and eat a Biscoff cookie and sit up in kind of an unnatural position and pretend I’m on a Delta flight.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I’m really getting tired of being a responsible adult.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Pro tip: Invest in pasta companies. Worth every penne.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Just once, I’d love to underthink a situation.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

The Epstein files are real, but they can’t figure out how to convert them to a PDF.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Whenever I go down the stairs next to an escalator, I always move faster than the escalator to prove to the people I made the better decision.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

All I’m saying is that at first I am shy and then I become a podcast.

Just shared via Messenger:

When we’re old, the children will use Covid to explain our brain damaged opinions much like we do to Boomers with lead. It is fate.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Hey! Sorry I missed your text, I am processing a non-stop 24/7 onslaught of information with a brain designed to eat berries in a cave.

Going viral on Threads:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Live now on Facebook:

If only my teeth were as white as my legs.

Spotted on WeChat:

You better pray to whatever god you serve that this email finds you before I do.

Going viral on Instagram:

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

Trending via Twitch:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Just landed via TikTok:

Y’all ever withheld good news so that it remains untouched by negativity?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Not gonna lie, to this day, I don’t know the difference between gray and grey, I just wing it.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Shazam but for random noises outside.

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Washing mushrooms is the quickest way to figure out exactly how much dirt you’re okay with eating.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨