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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

For Halloween, I will be okay.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Training a cat is very easy. After a few days, you do what she wants.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

I’m going to become more attractive or more delusional; I haven’t decided yet.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

I regret to inform you all that I just plan on getting hotter and weirder.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

My life coach traded me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,733

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Rehab is a great place to meet people that like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain.

Just shared via YouTube:

Are there cheat codes for parenting teenagers? This level is really hard.

Spotted on Slack:

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

Spotted on Twitch:

The first person to see a peacock spread his tail probably had a heart attack.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

The only Spanish I know is buenas noches, which means bonus nachos – like finding forgotten tortilla chips in your cargo shorts.

Trending via Facebook:

When you tickle a man to death by accident, it is manslaughter.

Seen just now on X:

Simplicity is so complicated.

Going viral on Snapchat:

We are so shocked by “Butthead” that we ignore the strangeness of the name “Beavis”.

Making waves on Twitch:

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Please hesitate to reach out.

Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

3 weeks ago

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When you want to be the center of attention but end up just toe-tally embarrassed instead 🎯😅👟

air, attention, awkward, bashful, blinking, dirt, getting, gun, humor, interaction, shoe, shooting, shy, social, social interaction

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95 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s really important to stay hydrated at work, so you can take as many 10-minute-long bathroom breaks as possible.

92 shares on WeChat this month:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

24 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I didn’t really feel old until my doctor hit me with the “at your age…”

87 shares on Reddit this month:

After having a week off, my boss returns to work today. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

35 shares on X this month:

Either the tables are going to turn, or I’m going to flip them.

52 shares on Discord this month:

The greatest research skill you can have is being a nosy bitch who wants to find out.

52 shares on X this month:

I usually don’t flirt, so if I flirt with you, please cooperate.

17 shares on X this month:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for a cauliflower cake, and I reported them for harmful content.

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

The only way to forget the mistakes you made in the past is to make even bigger and graver mistakes in the present.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Haircuts should be covered by insurance.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Job posting: $15/hr for master’s degree. Burrito menu: $23 for bean and cheese burrito.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

We’re all naughty, some just more than others.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Called in, “If we’re living in a simulation, just simulate that I’m in the office today.”

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Even on the coldest of days, there’s such peace found in the warm embrace of a hot pizza.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

The people that ask Grok everything are the same people that follow Google Map directions straight into a lake.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

Young people are too young nowadays. Back in the good old days, young people were my age.

Freshly posted on X:

My exorcist thinks we should see other demons.

Going viral on Threads:

“This was on sale!” is why I’m always broke.

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Activity Log ✨

Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

If I’m ever on life support, unplug me, then plug me back in. See if that works.

I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

If I’m ever on life support, unplug me, then plug me back in. See if that works.

I see from the back of your car that you have found Jesus, but not your turn signal.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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