Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Okay, that’s enough todaying for today.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

When this multivitamin kicks in I’m going to do so much success.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

Of course I stay hydrated. Carbohydrated.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Being naked with shoes on feels more naked than being totally naked.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

I still haven’t heard one good argument why I should stop believing in Santa.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

People just don’t stop, collaborate, and listen like they used to.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,553

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

I don’t do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision.

Spotted on Discord:

I’m not exaggerating when I say, if I ever clogged a toilet at work, I would immediately quit, change my name, and then move to a different city.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

Going viral on WeChat:

I love my cat, but I hope in her next life she’s reincarnated as the owner of a very whiny cat.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Much like lasagna, I’m just held together by cheese at this point.

Seen just now on X:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Breaking via Pinterest:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Stupid cow blocking the road. HOW DAIRY!

Just shared via Discord:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

Breaking via WeChat:

Porn is free, so why are you in my DMs?

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

4 weeks ago

Witty quote about bending rules with a playful, rebellious vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Another rule? Just call me the "Rule-ette"! 😜🚦💥

another, attitude, break, defiance, humor, i, me, nonconformity, rebellion, rule, rule-breaking, show, too

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Slack this month:

Moms be like, “Your cousin’s neighbor’s husband’s aunt died. Just thought you should know.”

87 shares on Threads this month:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

61 shares on Telegram this month:

364 days until Christmas, and people already have decorations up. Unbelievable.

37 shares on Instagram this month:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

71 shares on YouTube this month:

He took my last fry, your honor.

63 shares on Messenger this month:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Please, Tinder, add AI to your app. I don’t want to be involved in the modern dating experience. Let a robot do it for me. Let the machines suffer in our place.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

Science can’t explain it, but some hairs can grow up to a quarter inch overnight. Never in a good spot though.

35 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Told my girlfriend that Mum is deaf, so speak loud and slow. Also told Mum that my girlfriend has special needs.

74 shares on X this month:

I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

What’s your favorite song about a white boy playing funky music?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Obsessed with how Siri just doesn’t work at all, ever.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Can you lose weight by running away from your feelings?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

When you ask for your phone charger back and your teenager has the audacity to ask “what percentage are you on?”

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and share if you agree.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

Going viral on Slack:

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Making waves on TikTok:

Ever since I learned the show is called Suits because of lawsuits and not because they wear suits, I have harbored a hot white rage within me beyond anything mankind has ever known.

Going viral on Discord:

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

Just landed via Twitch:

Every grocery store becomes an escape room if you see someone you know.

Freshly posted on X:

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

The first sin in the Bible was eating an apple. The second was murder. That escalated quickly.

Trending via YouTube:

“What do your tattoos mean?” They mean I can sit still for a long time.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

We often come across people in life who make us think: “Oh look, evolution takes a break too!”

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

If they’re called leggings, why is your stomach in there?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

We often come across people in life who make us think: “Oh look, evolution takes a break too!”

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

I’m obsessed with adding a second completely unnecessary tweet to all my tweets, like, oh, you thought I was done.

If they’re called leggings, why is your stomach in there?

I was feeling kinda lonely this morning so I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car so people would wave at me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨