Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Some people graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Dating apps aren’t working. I’ll see ya at Home Depot, gentlemen.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I don’t understand baby oil. What are we greasing up all those babies for?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Sober in a taxi: Please. Stop talking to me. Drunk in a taxi: … And that, Mick, is why I’m emotionally unavailable, I suppose.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

I’d stalk me too, I get it.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,588

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

You come from dust and you will return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I’d rather you don’t watch me while I’m liking my own post.

Breaking via TikTok:

Penguins are just ducks going to a wedding.

Spotted on TikTok:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

Making waves on Discord:

If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I can’t explain it, but I am very bold and very shy at the same time.

Making waves on Telegram:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

Just landed via Telegram:

“It’s not that deep.” Of course it’s not. With a shallow mind like yours, nothing ever is.

Going viral on Messenger:

We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

Just landed via TikTok:

Just call me Mother Nature because I can go from hot to cold in a 24-hour period, too.

The only thing worse than a nightmare is waking up from a great dream before you get to see how it ends.

6 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When reality hits you like a cold shower just as you were getting to the good part 🌨️💤⏰

before, disappointment, dream, great, humor, irony, nightmare, only, sleep, thing, waking, waking up, worse

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Perks of dating me: you will be the hot one.

0

2 months ago

date, dating, hot, hot one, humor, me, perks, relationship, self-confidence
Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

0

2 months ago

before, enough, health, humor, i, me, paramedic, pass, pass out, reluctance, save, tomorrow, work, workplace
Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

0

2 months ago

50, angle, compliments, filter, fishing, humor, i, me, media, mess, morning, photo, right, self-esteem, selfie, social, social media
There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

0

2 months ago

absolutely, day, doing, doing nothing, enough, hours, humor, laziness, me, nothing, procrastination, time
I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

0

2 months ago

am, comedy, dessert, diet, food, food joke, humor, i, italian, Italian food, joke, just, leaving, pasta, pizza, speak, where, wordplay
Oh good. Another day.

0

2 months ago

another, day, good, humor, irony, oh, pessimism, routine, sarcasm

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Fun prank: make people study for many years, and then don’t give them jobs.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

21 shares on X this month:

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

46 shares on Discord this month:

Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

78 shares on TikTok this month:

I hate when I finish a show and don’t know what to do with my life.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

Coming back to your own bed after a few days away is peak coziness.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

Saturdays are for doing absolutely everything or doing absolutely nothing, everybody knows that.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Asian parents give you unmoanable names so you can focus on your studies.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Sometimes my greatest accomplishment is keeping my mouth shut.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Marriage is between two people: one person who is on the verge of sleep and one person who is asking if the front door is locked.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

I’m like … if parking too far away from the curb was a person.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

Trending via Pinterest:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Just landed via Telegram:

Bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Breaking via Reddit:

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Breaking via Discord:

If you like Christmas so much, why don’t you merry it?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Me: I love you more than a flower loves the sun. Him: I love you more than a teenager loves his phone.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The only thing worse than a nightmare is waking up from a great dream before you get to see how it ends.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Perks of dating me: you will be the hot one.

Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

Oh good. Another day.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨