There’s protein in foods that have never been protein before.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now I’m in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

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ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

“Are you okay?” No, it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes.

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Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

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I cannot definitively say, even after all I’ve seen, that I would not visit Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Sorry I’m late, traffic is exactly how it’s been every day for the past couple years, and I was not expecting that.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.