Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the luxurious life of a horse – wake up, munch on some hay, then doze off on it. Truly the embodiment of 'living the dream' 🐴🥖☀️ #HayGoals"

animal, bed, both, breakfast, food, hay, horse, humor, play, play on words, pun, words

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

2 months ago

accuse, brag, confidence, effort, ever, hard, humor, me, self-deprecation, too, trying
I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

2 months ago

cape, humor, lazy, procrastination, relaxation, super, today
I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

3 months ago

activity, doing, doing things, exhaustion, humor, i, just, next, people, procrastination, relaxation, sarcasm, things, understand, week, weekend, workweek
For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

2 months ago

anxiety, avoidance, avoiding, awkward, awkward encounter, collision, encounter, grocery, grocery store, introvert, kind, person, running, social, social anxiety, store, worst
One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

2 months ago

6, adulthood, appointment, appointments, closing, closing time, every, full, full-time job, i, job, management, never, place, schedule, thing, time, time management, understand, work
Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

2 months ago

advice, change, changing, Doc, doctor, give, health, humor, i, lifestyle, me, straight, straight talk, talk, wellness

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on Twitch this month:

Being bi means you say both yay and bruh.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

Can we talk about what little red riding hoods actual grandma must have looked like?

53 shares on YouTube this month:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

66 shares on Discord this month:

You can fake an American accent all you want, but “literally” will expose you.

87 shares on Discord this month:

If you’re going to text your boss that you’re an hour late, make sure you end with, “I’m bringing you a ham and cheese croissant.”

89 shares on WeChat this month:

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

95 shares on Instagram this month:

The good news is cannon deaths have gone down dramatically in the last hundred years.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

If I had a tiny girlfriend, I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

“A healthy lifestyle is all about balance,” I say as I drive through Taco Bell after working out.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Swimming is so embarrassing, everyone can see you want to be alive.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

The most dangerous drinking game I play, is seeing how long I can go without coffee.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Felony Vandalism is a beautiful name for a girl.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

I’m now at the age where happy hour is a nap.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Why do people always assume it’s a compliment when I tell them their baby looks just like them?

Live now on Pinterest:

Picking up women at the bar and then gently setting them down.

Just landed via Twitch:

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Just shared via Twitch:

Speaker phone in public should be illegal.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

Just landed via Telegram:

We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

Going viral on TikTok:

I personally feel like I have what it takes to become a fossil.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Every single morning, I have to get out of bed and do things, and it’s bullshit.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Just say, “My future husband would never do that,” and move on.

Just shared via Telegram:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

I don’t understand people who do things on weekends. You just did things all week. What’s next, more things? That’s how they get you.

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨