Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

Got electrocuted while fixing the doorbell, and now I can hear my girlfriend’s thoughts. She’s thinking she should have called an electrician.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Twitter is great because you can tweet “hi” and someone will tell you you’re wrong.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Did you get the telepathic message I sent earlier?

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Old age is always 15 years older than I am.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

I’m nervous that my diet pill will stick in my throat, so I usually eat a few cookies after to help push it down.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Toddlers negotiate like tiny mob bosses: it’s the hard way or the harder way.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I’m done with dating sites and am now only focusing on food delivery people. They have a job, a car, and most importantly food.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.