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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ด has shared:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ธ has downloaded:

Iโ€™m not a perfectionist. Iโ€™m more of a good-enoughist.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has downloaded:

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I donโ€™t want to go.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

Is it fall yet? I really canโ€™t suck my stomach in much longer.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has downloaded:

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฟ has viewed:

Homeless man just called me a โ€œloser,โ€ and I showed him my house keys.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ซ has downloaded:

Sleep hits different when you’re not supposed to be sleeping.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ผ has copied:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

Roses are pink. I need a drink.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡พ has viewed:

Straight man stuns they/them by ordering in fluent woke.

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Commentary:
Looks like my sarcasm translator is about to hit overdrive! ๐Ÿคช๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ“ฑ



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