Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Micro-dosing time travel by going to bed.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

It’s funny how our brains remember that we have forgotten something, but not what we have forgotten.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Is it still murder if they said, “Some other time,” but I thought they said smother time?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

I’d imagine the sound of clowns having sex would just be a cacophony of bicycle horns.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

I’ll find a cell mate before I’ll ever find a soulmate.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).