Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I would prefer not to.
  • At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.
  • Flat earth is too mainstream, hollow earth is where it’s at.
  • If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.
  • Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.
  • Anyone who deals with customers on a professional basis should be allowed to hand out one face slap per day.