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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

I really wish people would stop thinking they need to speak to me in the mornings.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I treat people the way I want to be treated by not leaving the house.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Working with children gives you so much in return. Lice, for example.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Hello, I’m looking for the people who said “I’ll always be there for you”. Has anyone seen them?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Who really needs jetpacks, I want to be able to start over from my last save point.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

I’m actually breaking generational curses by surviving my 20s without marrying a man who hates me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

822 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,984

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,984

Updated

42 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

Shared recently on Telegram:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Fall in love? I can barely fall asleep.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Don’t wait for later to eat the cake. Do it now, before another mammal of your household finds it.

Just shared via Messenger:

Is this art or trash?

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Love to go to hipster restaurants and eat half a grilled cheese off an old license plate.

Live now on Threads:

Penguins are just ducks going to a wedding.

Reported on Telegram:

Hey, are you an aurora borealis or why am I waiting in vain for you to appear?

Making waves on Telegram:

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Going viral on X:

There is no bigger lie than “fun for the whole family”.

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?
Download image ↓

Commentary:
🚶‍♂️🤬 When you’re stuck behind a slow-moving shopper at the grocery store, it's like a whole new level of pedestrian road rage! You find yourself silently debating whether you should overtake them on the left or the right, all while trying to resist the urge to honk your non-existent horn. Ah, the joys of navigating the treacherous aisles of the supermarket at a snail's pace! 😅 #GroceryStoreTrafficJam

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

822 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,984

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,984

Updated

42 minutes ago

Users Online

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

My dog sure does give a lot of side eye for someone without a job.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

We all have that person who insists on using a blanket on the couch, no matter the weather.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

I always have a bad connection in my head when someone tries to explain a card or board game to me.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Proposing at someone else’s wedding is out. Die at their funeral like a real man.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I always carry a knife with me in case I run into someone with 10,000 spoons.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

Just landed via X:

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

Making waves on Facebook:

Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My bad if I ever left you on read. I didn’t mean to open the message.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Just landed via YouTube:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

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