A friend’s boyfriend is not my friend… that is a coworker, at best.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Why sleep when you can stay up all night overthinking?

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

All income is disposable if you’re brave enough.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

If painting yourself into a corner was considered art, I’d be Michelangelo.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

The worst thing you can do when cleaning your house is “sit down for a minute.”

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Even before the internet, I always had a little side chat going on in my head.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

I’m the type of idiot to be loyal during the talking stage.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

American homes are so strange because, why is your front door in the living room?