Apple juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol, but it’s too shy.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

I always set two alarms, one for “Good Intentions Me” and one for “The Real Me”

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

How do you react when you see someone you respect on an e-scooter?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

My new diet plan is to hibernate and live off all this fat I’ve accumulated.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Why did they call it painting your toenails and not graffeeti?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

I am a person who wants to get a lot done, trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep in and take naps at times.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Dating apps never work for me because I need at least two years of friendship charged with weird sexual tension to even consider falling in love.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.