Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Boyfriend hasn’t accepted my LinkedIn request yet. He doesn’t want to connect. He doesn’t want to build.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

I love a touchy-feely man. Like, yes, please keep your hands on me.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

It’s perfectly normal if you want to watch an actor’s entire filmography because you find them attractive. Don’t let anyone stop you.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Really just want to meet someone who knows what songs not to talk over.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I’d log off, but I get so tired of hearing myself talk.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

I love tennis but never really been clear why they need a lifeguard.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,645

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

All strapless bras need to be taken off the shelves. A total recall. We do not have the technology yet.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

If my neighbors keep fighting like this, I might need to cancel some of my streaming services.

Going viral on Slack:

When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Oh, sorry about bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to slam my head into the walls anymore.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Going bananas on Threads:

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

Just shared via Twitch:

It’s not a competition, but if it was I would win.

Trending via Reddit:

Well, I’ve been depressed and poor, but sure, we’ll call it intermittent fasting.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Why socialize when you could party inside your room with your 10+ personalities?

Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Trying to avoid ghosts of bad WiFi past! 📱🔦😂

analogy, carrying, daily, daily life, habit, humor, lantern, life, modern, modern habit, phone, room, technology, Victorian, Victorian woman, woman

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

0

1 month ago

doctor, drink, drinking, health, humor, i, joke, me, mirror, self-reflection, watch
It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.

0

2 months ago

after, awkward, awkward moment, back, comeback, failure, five, funny situation, hard, high, high five, humor, interaction, moment, poorly, situation, social, social interaction
I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

0

2 months ago

am, ask, communication, function, hate, humor, i, interaction, introvert, me, much, others, people, personality, quiet, rude, rudeness, social, social interaction, talk, talking, why
At least life has music.

0

2 weeks ago

humor, least, life, music, positivity
Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

0

3 months ago

actually, cleaning, countertop, countertop cleaning, daily, daily routine, face, face washing, feet, feet washing, floor, floor cleaning, forearm, forearm washing, hair, hair washing, hand, hand washing, hands, humor, hygiene, multitasking, routine, shirt, shirt washing, washing
The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

0

1 month ago

animal, animal metaphor, concern, confidence, humor, independence, lion, metaphor, proof, social, social proof

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on TikTok this month:

Can we talk about what little red riding hoods actual grandma must have looked like?

51 shares on Reddit this month:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

94 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

33 shares on Pinterest this month:

Stop asking people over 40 what we like to do for fun. You’re not gonna like the answer.

62 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.

84 shares on WeChat this month:

“Stop recording everything and just enjoy the moment” is asking me for videos from last night.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

Female rage is your handbag continuously slipping off your shoulder.

59 shares on X this month:

The first bowl of cereal makes you want a second, but the second makes you wish you stopped at the first.

95 shares on Twitch this month:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Marriage is just asking each other, “What do you want to do for dinner?” and then replying, “No, not that,” until death do us part.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I should go to jail so I can focus on the gym.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

He’s a 10, but it’s the pain scale.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Every single bad day happened because I woke up.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

You looked so beautiful and combative as we were detained for questioning.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Spotted on TikTok:

When gearing up for a mountain climbing adventure it is important to remember to no.

Shared recently on X:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Going viral on Threads:

Reading a book and coming across a character’s name that you don’t know how to pronounce, so for the rest of the book, every time you see it, your brain just goes ‘skdjfkskakfk.’

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

Seen just now on Slack:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Just shared via Slack:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

Making waves on TikTok:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.

I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

At least life has music.

Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨