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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

I know which nation I like best. Hibernation.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

I don’t get involved in anyone’s business, let alone their drama. You should try it.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Just realized when I get a partner, that means my family is gonna know that I have feelings.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

(While my wife opens up her Christmas present) Remember when you said we needed milk?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

A cheat code to adulting is to always have something to look forward to, no matter how small or big.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Pinterest:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Going viral on Slack:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I think there’s a size limit on engagement rings before they look tacky, to me.

Making waves on Telegram:

They’re selling me on Temu tomorrow.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Just shared via X:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Crying while wearing a backpack has unlocked a new level of humiliation I did not know was possible.

Shared recently on WeChat:

A genie that does my bidding would fix me.

Decorated the house across the street so I can look out the window and enjoy my handiwork.

2 weeks ago

Humorous quote about decorating, featuring witty pride in home improvement.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like someone is embracing the "Neighborhood Design Guru" title with gusto! 🎨🏡 Who needs a TV when you can simply gaze out the window at your masterpiece across the street? Just don't forget the popcorn for the daily show! 🍿

across, activity, creative, creative activity, decorated, decorated house, decoration, enjoy, fun, handiwork, holiday, holiday spirit, home, home decoration, house, i, neighborly, neighborly fun, spirit, street, view, window, window view

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

People are too judgmental these days… I can tell just by looking at them.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

ADHD is: being pretty good at basically anything you want to be, and absolutely terrible at anything you need to do to live.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The 70s, 80s, and 90s were the best decades – so many memories, no evidence.

94 shares on Threads this month:

You know you’re old when you you barely do anything all day, but still need a nap to continue doing barely anything.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

94 shares on Slack this month:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

53 shares on WeChat this month:

Listen to your body? The body that craves a lethal amount of Kinder Bueno?

11 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

41 shares on Instagram this month:

Sorry for texting back instantly. My phone is in my hand, I’m mature, and I like you.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Some days you’re the shit and some days you’re the fan.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s funny we got universal near-perfect free translation, and the world didn’t really change at all.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfair that the older I get, the clearer photo quality gets.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

College is not even mentioned once in the Bible. Somebody get me outta here.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I watched a woman clean her whole house on YouTube today, in case you thought I lacked ambition.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Wow, this is a really nice, sturdy box. I should keep it in the attic for the next 20 years.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,637

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

The struggle to get off the couch and into bed is real.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Meteorologist: It’s going to get even hotter. Me, on fire: WHAT?

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

If you’re late for work, don’t forget to look mad when you walk in.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

If we start flirting now, we could be in matching pajamas on a Christmas card before the holidays.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Popping your head in the cockpit and saying, “Anywhere here will do, chief.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

Just shared via Messenger:

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The Airbnb reviews never tell you how comfortable the toilets are for falling asleep on.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Shared recently on Slack:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Breaking via Threads:

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

Just landed via Threads:

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

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