Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.
  • I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.
  • Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.
  • I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.
  • Stranger: Your children are angels. Me: So was the devil.
  • The guy in the stall beside doesn’t know he can shut off his camera shutter.