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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

By age 40, you should have an entire wardrobe of clothes—one size too small—that you keep in eternal optimism that you’ll fit in them again one day.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Getting road rage alone in my house.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Social media is mental suicide.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,276

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Mr. Mixed Signals decided he likes me today.

Trending via X:

Everybody boo’d up, and I’m getting treated like celery on a hot wing plate.

Trending via Twitch:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

Just landed via YouTube:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’ve touched enough cacti to know they are sharp, but also not enough to stop touching cacti.

Making waves on Slack:

When the weather gets warmer, I will become unstoppable. As long as it doesn’t get too warm, then I will be stoppable.

Going viral on Messenger:

Not being filthy rich is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Going viral on Slack:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

Funny barn quotes

Funny barn quotes bring a hearty dose of laughter to farm life 🐄🌾 Whether you’re a city slicker or a seasoned farmer, these witty sayings capture the charm and chaos of barnyard adventures 🐓🤣 Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even snort like a horse with these barn-inspired gems that celebrate life on the farm with a playful twist 🐴✨

New funny barn quotes 👇

All funny barn quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Twitch this month:

My husband has entered the “fun socks” years.

27 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Kind of miraculous how much love can be summoned and how much your day can be improved by just looking at an animal and saying stuff in a weird voice.

55 shares on Facebook this month:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

23 shares on Facebook this month:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

By the time I meet the right person, I’ll probably be the wrong person.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

Worst part of a corporate job is no tips. Someone should slip you a $20 if you write a killer email.

70 shares on Slack this month:

Instead of renting an apartment, I’m going to save up for a lighthouse and go insane in it.

33 shares on Slack this month:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The man who invented the Ferris wheel never met the man who invented the merry-go-round. They traveled in different circles.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My therapist said this to me, and it hit me like a brick: “They’re not your friends if they disagree with you or try to challenge you.”

17 folks are currently checking 👀

At the strip club sighing until one of the dancers asks me what’s wrong.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

And then one day, life was like… hold my beer.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I can relate to America, because I too am about to enter a depression.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

This cop is parked illegally behind me with his lights on. I’m going to say something.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

In honor of the last eclipse, I will also get in the way of someone brighter than me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My ideal workday would be from 9:00 AM to 9:07 AM

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,622

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Coding: Where incessantly talking to yourself seems completely normal and debugging is like being a detective in a movie where you are both the detective and the perpetrator.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Ever since I learned about the concept of networking, I knew I was going to have to do everything alone and do it the hard way.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Shoutout to everyone pretending to have it together. Same.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

In terms of wasting time, today was very productive.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My favorite exercise is a combination of a lunge and a crunch. It’s called lunch.

Spotted on Facebook:

I’m not going to die because of an accident. Nor because of an illness. But from small talk. Someone will say one boring sentence too many and I’ll drop dead.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

Going viral on Facebook:

Putting together a piece of furniture today, so my kids are about to learn swear words that haven’t even been invented yet.

Live now on Snapchat:

Going to a concert with a tomato in each hand just to make the band nervous.

Spotted on Discord:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

If I were Noah, I’d bring three of every animal just to create some drama.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

“What’s your 5-year plan?” I’ll probably go to the movies next week, I think.

Trending via Snapchat:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

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