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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Just had my biannual teeth cleaning like some barn animal.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Petition to lower the retirement age. I’m tired now.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

I love when the restaurant bathroom has different music playing than the restaurant. It’s like I’m going to Club Pee Pee.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

I wonder if the fall of Rome was this stupid.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Toddlers be like, we can do this the hard way or the harder way.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

I think that McDonalds is putting an unhealthy amount of lettuce in the Big Macs these days.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I just need a day between everyday… to recover from the day before… just so I can prepare for the day coming.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

Making waves on WeChat:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

Making waves on Twitch:

Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons.

Live now on YouTube:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Live now on X:

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor got slapped.

Reported on Discord:

I deserve an Oscar for telling my dentist I don’t eat candy.

Just shared via Slack:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Breaking via Reddit:

I am an influencer. If you aren’t influenced in any way, that is on you. Do better.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

A weighted blanket isn’t enough today, I need to be compressed into a zip-file.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Capri Sun tastes as if scientists had bet that they could make fruit juice without fruit.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

You can’t spell dyslexia without sexy.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts “OH NO” and that’s kind of like what politicians do.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Live now on Instagram:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

Reported on Twitch:

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

Reported on YouTube:

Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

Trending via Twitch:

My husband has entered the “fun socks” years.

Just landed via TikTok:

“Each to their own!” Translation: You’re wrong, but never mind.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

Spotted on Twitch:

My first mistake of my life was my birth.

Making waves on X:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

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