Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Lowkey wanna fall in love, but Monday to Friday is work, Saturday is laundry, Sunday is mental prep for Monday. The butterflies in my stomach are actually decomposing.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

“I’m a very sleepy person, just at all the wrong times.”

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Expiration date? More like spoiler alert.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

The zero likes won’t stop me from posting. I will talk to myself if I have to.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Like me, the weather is getting cooler around here.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Stop normalizing things, we’ll run out of the weird shit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,246

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Betrayal only comes from someone we’re close to. Just like herpes.

Just shared via Slack:

Never trust someone who can eat 24/7 but is still skinny.

Going viral on Discord:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Spotted on Discord:

Ozzy Osbourne has mumbled through entire sentences, and I still understood him better than most of my exes.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Every girl has a dude in her inbox talking to himself.

Trending via YouTube:

Putting a blanket over my boss so he thinks it’s night time and goes to sleep.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I’d imagine the sound of clowns having sex would just be a cacophony of bicycle horns.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

If we get invaded by space aliens, I am immediately defecting to the alien side. Sorry.

Going viral on Instagram:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Funny bezos quotes

Funny Bezos quotes 😂💼 are the perfect blend of wit and wisdom from the mastermind behind Amazon 🚀📦. Whether you’re a fan of his bold business moves or just love a good laugh, these gems highlight Jeff Bezos’ unique sense of humor and clever insights 😎✨. Get ready to smile and maybe even see the billionaire in a whole new light! 🌟💬

New funny bezos quotes 👇

All funny bezos quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on WeChat this month:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

34 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t listen to any thoughts about yourself if your hair isn’t washed. It’s just not true.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

What a time to be alive! (Derogatory)

100 shares on Instagram this month:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

92 shares on X this month:

Why do flat earthers care so much? Like, what if the Earth is flat. What now?

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m so glad I cleaned the house so the kids have a clean canvas to drop their stuff everywhere.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

40 shares on WeChat this month:

Naturally introverted, selectively extroverted.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

This salad tastes like I’d rather be fat.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I see posts like, “If food is too expensive, just grow your own.” Okay, Einstein, why didn’t I think of that?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, you should start your own business and then mind it.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Eleven out of ten people are stupid.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite color is sunshine.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever have a crush on someone and want it to end, listen to a podcast they are on.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Every homemade dinner counts as negative calories because of the exercise we get waving pillows at the smoke detectors.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,383

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

They should invent a “stay signed in” checkbox that isn’t meaningless.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

US etiquette question: Do you need to tip the guy at the border who reads your last five years of social media history?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

You ever notice how fans of the worst music always focus on the meanings of the songs instead of the actual music?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Adulthood is just waking up tired one day, and then being tired forever after that.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Brushing your teeth at night is a hellish chore. Walking from bed to bathroom feels harder than working in the mines all day. I’m getting pissed just thinking about it.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Friendly reminder that double negatives are a big no-no.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

Trending via YouTube:

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

Going viral on Instagram:

Getting a boner because the Lego instructions are telling me what to do.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

Freshly posted on X:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

It triggers the little girl in me when I feel like I’m not being listened to when I’m talking.

Going viral on X:

I’d be a horrible stalker… I’m always late.

Shared recently on X:

Congratulations on angrily speeding past me to get to the red light first. You’re special.

Trending via Snapchat:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer the term selective participation.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

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