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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Hear me out. A waiting room where the doctors wait.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

People aren’t too bad if you stay away from them and don’t go outside.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Women are actually very understanding if you’re honest with them, especially if they like you. You don’t even have to do all that lying.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

You can’t convince me that 2020 didn’t open a portal to hell that we’re still living in.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,514

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Instagram:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Just landed via Facebook:

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

Spotted on X:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Just shared via WeChat:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Making waves on Instagram:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

Just shared via Twitch:

If you apply enough sunscreen, the rain simply rolls off.

Shared recently on X:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.

Shared recently on Slack:

There’s going to be a full moon this Christmas! Because mixing family and alcohol together wasn’t enough…

Shared recently on Discord:

I wish more dumb people were shy.

Funny consumer rights quotes

New funny consumer rights quotes 👇

“I bought this while depressed” should be an acceptable reason to get a full refund on a return.

0

2 months ago

acceptable, consumer, consumer rights, depressed, depression, excuse, full, humor, i, reason, refund, retail, return, rights, shopping, should, while

All funny consumer rights quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on X this month:

Nobody lures you into a gingerbread house in the forest anymore.

59 shares on Instagram this month:

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

43 shares on Instagram this month:

Who called it a shopaholic and not a boughtanist?

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

41 shares on WeChat this month:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

96 shares on X this month:

Do mens sneezes get louder and louder as they age until they explode?

81 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t post for money or fame, I post because there’s something seriously wrong with me.

28 shares on WeChat this month:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

56 shares on Discord this month:

Dating is the process of meeting someone until you find out what’s wrong with them.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Bluesky honestly feels like a miracle where you take the most annoying people in the world and stick them in a broken elevator together.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

My addiction to buying things I don’t need started at the school book fair.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

They say the best things take time. That’s why I’m always late.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

I’m not bothered if you don’t like me, awesomeness isn’t for everyone.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

Just landed via Facebook:

A gambler is only called an addict when he loses.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Does anyone know how to lower the difficulty setting on my life?

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Being silly is very important for my mental health.

Making waves on Messenger:

Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Just landed via X:

The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

Live now on Reddit:

Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny consumer rights quotes

New funny consumer rights quotes 👇

“I bought this while depressed” should be an acceptable reason to get a full refund on a return.

All funny consumer rights quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨