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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

If I ask “What’s your zodiac sign?” it’s either because we’re vibing or you’re getting on my nerves.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Sure I collect antiques, if you count the late-century spices in my pantry.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

There’s a rhyming Italian expression for saying “take it or leave it” that goes “o mangi questa minestra o salti dalla finestra”. It means “either eat this soup or throw yourself out the window”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

804 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,966

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,966

17 minutes ago

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

Just shared via Threads:

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please stop making her go to work.

Just landed via Instagram:

I mostly keep friendships going because they have my good Tupperware.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I’ve got a headache, and it’s affecting my entire future.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

Seen just now on Discord:

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

Making waves on Telegram:

I noticed you haven’t posted in a few weeks, and just wanted to thank you.

Making waves on Slack:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

Home » Funny Cooking Mishap Quotes

Funny cooking mishap quotes

New funny cooking mishap quotes 👇

4 months ago
Share →: You can add tears while cooking if you don’t have salt.

Commentary:
"Who needs salt for seasoning when you have a good old sprinkle of tears instead? 😂👩‍🍳 Just don't forget to stir in some frustration and a pinch of existential crisis for that extra flavor boost! 😉🍳 #ChefsOfTheTears"
6 months ago
Share →: Cooking with glasses on is so humiliating. Why did I just get blinded by steam?

Commentary:
Oh, the perils of culinary vision impairment! 👓🔥 Who knew that steam could strike back with such vengeance? Perhaps it's time to invest in some anti-fogging goggles for your next kitchen escapade! 😆🍳

For even more funny cooking mishap quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny cooking mishap quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

804 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,966

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,966

17 minutes ago

3,426

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Just got my test results back and my cholesterol level is a cheese bratwurst.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

The first person to see a peacock spread his tail probably had a heart attack.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Children are so giving. For example, my kids gave me a cold.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I think God was high when he made me.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

I always say “morning” instead of “good morning”, because if it was a good morning, I’d still be asleep.

Going viral on Threads:

Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

Going viral on TikTok:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

Spotted on Telegram:

Life is short, flirt with me!

Spotted on Telegram:

If I were god, I would’ve rested all 7 days.

Going viral on Instagram:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Making waves on TikTok:

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

Seen just now on Threads:

I no longer dislike Mondays, I’m mature now… I dislike the whole week.

Reported on Facebook:

You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

Going viral on Instagram:

The me who snips coupons needs to communicate better with the me who walks into the stores.

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