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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

It whistles, doesn’t it? Your head when it’s windy.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Started the year single. Ending the year single. Consistency is key.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Whoever said “out of sight out of mind” never lost a spider in the bedroom.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Days without shaking my head disapprovingly at myself: 0.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say “repairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

781 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,943

Funny Quotes Topics

13,915

Funny Quotes Images

10,943

Updated

55 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Fries, not lies.

Trending via Messenger:

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

Freshly posted on X:

She calls me Anthony Bourdain because I eat her parts unknown, no reservations.

Just landed via Threads:

Instagram is literally just screenshots of Twitter.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I thought my mixed signals were perfectly clear.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Grandparents are there to help the kids get into trouble and teach them stupid things they wouldn’t think of on their own.

Seen just now on Discord:

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Making waves on WeChat:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

781 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,943

Funny Quotes Topics

13,915

Funny Quotes Images

10,943

Updated

55 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

It’s getting very expensive to be alive.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

It’s so funny that people directly compare Dune and Furiosa when all that they have in common is that there’s sand.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Messenger:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Going viral on Pinterest:

Having a job ruined my life.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

Seen just now on Messenger:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

Reported on Instagram:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Just shared via X:

We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, “I’ve decided I want to be cremated.” I said, “Alright, get your coat.”

Seen just now on X:

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

Freshly posted on Slack:

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

Making waves on X:

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

Just landed via Discord:

Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.

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