Commentary:
Guess I’ll just flip a coin before tying the knot 🤔💍😂
30 Funny divorce quotes
The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.
Commentary:
Finally an event I don't have to make excuses for missing! 🎉🙌
For my next trick, I’ll need a divorce lawyer.
Commentary:
"Forget magic wands, this trick could really disappear some assets! 🪄💼💸🤣"
Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.
Commentary:
"Taking 'commitment issues' to a whole new level! 😂📚🔞"
The lion does not concern himself with divorce papers.
Commentary:
"When you're a lion, you just swipe right on life. 🦁✍️😂 #NoTimeForPapers"
I had 99 problems but getting divorced solved 98 of them.
Commentary:
"Who says breaking up can't be a win-win situation? 🙌 When life hands you lemons, sometimes divorce hands you the whole fruit basket! 🍋😂#ProblemSolved"
You don’t scare me, I was married once.
Commentary:
"Ah, the battle-tested warrior of relationships! 💪🏼💍 Who needs fear when you've survived the ultimate challenge? Take that, unknown adversaries! 😂 #MarriageWarrior"
Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.
Commentary:
Ah, elections – the ultimate family drama on a national scale! 🤣 It's like we're all caught in the crossfire of a messy breakup, anxiously waiting to see who ends up with custody of our future. 🗳️💔 Let's just hope they don't make us choose between weekends and holidays! #ElectionDrama #CustodyBattle
Divorce is so weird. Why do I have an ex-aunt?
Commentary:
"Divorce really turns family trees into family shrubs. 🌳🪓 Having an ex-aunt is like owning a discontinued edition of a relative. 🤷♂️ It's all fun and games until the family reunion becomes a 'where are they now' episode." #AwkwardFamilyDynamics 😅
My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.
Commentary:
Looks like his marriage is facing a force to be reckoned with! 🌌💔 May the divorce settlement be fair and may the custody of the collectibles be shared! 🤣 #StarWarsMarriageDrama