Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

People say 70-80 year olds are unemployable because of mental decline, yet somehow they’re running all the countries.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Spent 20 minutes training ChatGPT to write the perfect anniversary note for my wife, so don’t try to tell me I’m not romantic.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Why is 4-8 p.m. on a Sunday the most depressing time ever?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,640

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

British people be like “YouChube.”

Seen just now on Threads:

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

Making waves on TikTok:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Breaking via Telegram:

It’s not sleeping alone if there are crumbs in your bed.

Going viral on Snapchat:

A true friend is someone who thinks you’re a good egg, even though they know you’re slightly cracked.

Trending via Facebook:

Senility is the pits. Spent an hour driving around the mall parking lot looking for my car.

Making waves on Snapchat:

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

Breaking via Messenger:

No HR complaint formed against me shall prosper.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

When I moved into my new igloo, my friends threw me a surprise housewarming party. Now I’m homeless.

Just shared via Discord:

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

Funny drilling quotes

Funny drilling quotes 🛠️😂 bring a hilarious twist to the world of power tools and hard hats! Whether you’re a pro or just love a good pun, these witty lines will make you chuckle while you tackle any project. Get ready to drill into laughter and nail the fun with jokes that hit the spot every time! 🔩🤣 #ToolTime #PunchlinePower

New funny drilling quotes 👇

All funny drilling quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

58 shares on Snapchat this month:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

69 shares on Telegram this month:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

94 shares on LinkedIn this month:

People who often talk to themselves are more intelligent than others. At least that’s what I tell myself.

24 shares on WeChat this month:

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

85 shares on Discord this month:

Thought you guys should know this was only Monday. It’s also still Monday.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

92 shares on Discord this month:

Europeans read a lot because their television shows suck.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

If you’re late for work, don’t forget to look mad when you walk in.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

I’ve started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it’s saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I said “cool tattoo” to be nice not because I wanted to hear the 45 minute origin story.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My parents didn’t raise me to order something expensive when someone else is paying.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

So, if I take out a reverse mortgage on my house does that mean I’ll own a bank after 30 years?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,435

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

An article of clothing left on the floor long enough becomes clean again because the germs eventually get bored and leave.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

If you ever have a crush on someone and want it to end, listen to a podcast they are on.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Sorry I’m late, I got here as soon as I wanted to.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I told my suitcase we wouldn’t be going on vacation this year; now it’s dead inside and I’m left with emotional baggage.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Asking the pharmacy if they have a secret menu.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

“You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

It’s crazy that you don’t really argue with a baby for the first year of its life and then you have to argue with the baby every day.

Live now on Twitch:

I have been touched inappropriately by the sun today.

Trending via YouTube:

Checking my iced coffee rewards points like it’s my 401k.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Bob Ross could paint a forest in 10 minutes. I’ve been ‘working on myself’ for years, and I’m still unfinished.

Seen just now on Twitch:

The bank just called and gave me the biggest compliment, said my balance is outstanding. I really needed that today.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Reoccurring dreams be like: ‘I dunno, here’s a rerun’

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

Making waves on Discord:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color.

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