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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Unknown numbers will call me, then expect me to talk first. Welcome to the breathing competition.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Managed to empty the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something there takes on a life of its own.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

A few months after the wedding, Cinderella’s husband began to complain about her having too many shoes.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Avocado is just green butter.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, you’re drunk. Ducks don’t talk.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,970

Funny Quotes Topics

14,774

Funny Quotes Images

11,970

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Seen just now on Twitch:

When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.

Trending via Pinterest:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Just shared via YouTube:

The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!

Just shared via Messenger:

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

Just landed via Threads:

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Life begins when you can afford it.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Have you noticed? When the relationship is new, the guy is never busy.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

Spotted on Slack:

I am writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don’t buy it.

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Funny feeling young quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1808 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,970

Funny Quotes Topics

14,774

Funny Quotes Images

11,970

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

“Age is just a number!” Yeah, the older I get, the number I feel.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

First date idea: we walk around a graveyard and guess how people died.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

If I’m ever on life support, unplug me, then plug me back in. See if that works.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Coffee should be free for everyone Monday through Friday.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Wanted to update everybody on my diet. I’ve decided it’s okay to be fat.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Live now on Slack:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

Making waves on TikTok:

They should invent a type of situation that improves.

Spotted on Threads:

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Just shared via Facebook:

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Trending via Discord:

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Shared recently on Slack:

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

Freshly posted on Threads:

“I’m not falling for that again,” I say, as I’m about to fall for whatever that is again.

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