Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Have kids so you can fully appreciate how well your dog listens.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

What part of “hiii” do you not get? I’m in love with you.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Adulting: unlocking life’s mysteries, one therapy session at a time.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Sorry I zoned out during your story… my brain was offering me multiple side quests and overthinking opportunities.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Porn actresses envy the look on my face when I clean my ear with a cotton bud.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,398

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

I wonder if people that fall asleep right away know that we hate them.

Just landed via Telegram:

I don’t mind driving in bad weather. I mind other people driving in bad weather.

Just landed via YouTube:

I accidentally clicked on an ad, so I guess I will see that product all over my phone until I’m dead.

Spotted on WeChat:

Someone asked, “Can I bum a scroll?” because they deleted Instagram off their phone.

Going bananas on X:

I even procrastinate things I actually want to do.

Going viral on Reddit:

I hope the aliens aren’t good at basketball. My chances of making it into the NBA are already slim.

Just landed via WeChat:

The people who “don’t have time” and the people who “always find time” have the same amount of time.

Making waves on X:

I’m convinced the washing machine is a portal to another dimension for socks.

Shared recently on YouTube:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Job applications are so stupid. “What’s your desired salary?” Ten billion dollars. Next question.

Funny finger guns quotes

New funny finger guns quotes 👇

All funny finger guns quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Reddit this month:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

36 shares on Facebook this month:

Nothing really prepares you for when your favorite sweatpants begin to fall apart.

54 shares on WeChat this month:

I never get as envious of parents as I do when their baby starts crying and they get to leave the event.

85 shares on WeChat this month:

Guy in front of me at the movies was reading the popcorn Wikipedia page while he was eating popcorn.

13 shares on Instagram this month:

Why do we say ‘slept like a baby’? Babies wake up every two hours crying. I want to sleep like my cat—14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

65 shares on Telegram this month:

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

82 shares on X this month:

When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

23 shares on Telegram this month:

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

14 shares on Slack this month:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

Every day is leg day when you’re running from your problems.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing worse than when I turn up to Park Run to find it is indeed going ahead.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

In these difficult times, it’s important to remember that cheese exists.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be a zoo that has people from every country in it.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?” And I told him, “No, it doesn’t.”

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If you show her you care, she will keep you as a spare.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Spice up your work day by drinking your coffee from a flask.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I love all the Winter Olympic events, sliding downhill on a piece of wood, sliding downhill on two pieces of wood, sliding downhill in a piece of wood. All amazing.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

And then one day, life was like… hold my beer.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Please try to schedule meetings around my need for attention.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Slapping the TV remote on your knee extends the battery life. It’s science.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Just shared via Reddit:

Being married means mostly shouting “What?” from other rooms.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I have a mental illness that makes me think that people will change their minds if I present the correct arguments with the appropriate facts and data.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

Making waves on YouTube:

All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.

Making waves on Twitch:

Alexa, mute my children.

Making waves on X:

I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

“The average CEO reads 52 books a year.” Yeah, because they’ve got nothing else to do.

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