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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Accidentally blurted out “skip intro” when my mother-in-law wasn’t getting to the point.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

My goal is to do one thing each day that could prevent me from being elected to political office.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

The human body requires so much maintenance. Who designed this thing?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park, but it’s just really hard to find thirty-two of them willing to do it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,694

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

Just landed via Discord:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Trending via Pinterest:

Twitter is an abusement park.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I might look like I have my life together, but that’s only because the mess is out of the camera frame.

Just landed via Threads:

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

Broadcasted on X:

I appreciate all clouds. Fluffy, non-fluffy… it’s how Bob Ross would’ve wanted it.

Just landed via Snapchat:

The only thing preventing me from moving to Finland is the language barrier and a job.

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m not good at quickly making up derogatory names on the fly, unless I’m driving.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Being social sucks all my energy.

Trending via Facebook:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,663

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Why aren’t we using these t-shirt cannons for burritos?

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

A moth is just a butterfly with glasses and its hair up.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Babies invented being in a bad mood for no reason, and they continue to innovate in the field.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

My coworkers think I’m always busy, but I’m really just trying to remember my password.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

Spotted on Discord:

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Breaking via Slack:

As a simulation, this all kinda sucks.

Just shared via Instagram:

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

Broadcasted on X:

Petition to lower the retirement age. I’m tired now.

Breaking via TikTok:

Unless it’s manic, I don’t want to hear about your Monday.

Going viral on Messenger:

It may sound crazy but some of us are nice without hidden agendas.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Facing my uncle’s dreaded lightning bolt attack at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

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