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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

The best thing about dogs is you can act like something really good just happened, and they’ll instantly start celebrating too. They have no idea what the context is; they’re just always ready to party, no matter what.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Everyone’s gangsta till you’re waiting on your dog to poop.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Off to my crying appointment (therapy).

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I feel bad for Slash. He bought a goofy hat in like 1986 and now he has to wear it until the day he dies.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Not going is the new leaving early.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Pro Tip: Never make snow angels in a dog park.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Teach a man to fish, and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach your kid about stingrays, and he will pretend to sting you all afternoon.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

An adult is a person that keeps Ibuprofen in more than one place.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

509 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,102

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,102

Updated

Dec 24, 2025

Users Online

4,049

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Making waves on YouTube:

A true friend is someone who thinks you’re a good egg, even though they know you’re slightly cracked.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I have tasted academic validation. I have tasted romantic love. I recommend getting a hobby.

Just shared via Threads:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Making waves on WeChat:

Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

“I saw your ex!” A very unnecessary piece of information.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Just landed via X:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

Making waves on TikTok:

Much like a candle, I was tall when I was young, but I get shorter as I grow old.

Home » Funny Forename Quotes

Funny forename quotes

New funny forename quotes 👇

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

0

2 months ago

again, Britain, case, catchphrase, clever, forename, hello, humor, i, identity, joke, missed, real, spy, surname, tell

All funny forename quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Messenger this month:

The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

63 shares on Telegram this month:

Sometimes I don’t worry about things at all and other times I am awake.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

Hey beauty brands who make face creams: 30ml is only enough for an ant’s face.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

A flat stomach is one of the best accessories.

40 shares on YouTube this month:

I really hope my house is haunted and not in need of structural repairs.

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you think you’re going to be in a dangerous situation, dress accordingly. Don’t wear flip-flops to a bank robbery, for example.

12 shares on Threads this month:

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

82 shares on Twitch this month:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

18 shares on Facebook this month:

Whoever first said, “I’m in a pickle,” must have had the weirdest day.

20 shares on X this month:

Gen Z will be like “OMG new life hack!” and then it’s a video of them adjusting the toaster dial.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Sometimes I can’t believe people have had the honor of experiencing my love and chose to hurt me instead.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

If someone asks why you’re so pale, simply reply, completely shocked, “You can see me?”

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Mercury retrograde: because adulting is hard, and sometimes you just need a celestial excuse.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Might go to prison so I can focus on the gym properly.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

If we “talk,” you ain’t single. We’re in a pending relationship. You’re in the cart.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

If I was an elephant, you’d all be sorry.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Why is Saturday over in 7 minutes and Sunday in 4 minutes, but Monday is 84 months long?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

Just shared via Instagram:

I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Everybody in the world, stop fighting or no dessert.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

At my funeral, take the bouquet off my casket and throw it in the crowd to see who next.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Seen just now on Telegram:

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Welcome to Twitter, where people never let their lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a strong opinion.

Making waves on Facebook:

I never oversleep in the mornings. I set an alarm and a back-up alarm. Plus, there’s also a noisy kid once those fail.

Trending via Messenger:

Breaking News: Jenny on Facebook is having salad for dinner tonight.

Just shared via YouTube:

Stopped using exclamation points in work messages so my coworkers know they’ve killed my spirit.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Funny forename quotes

New funny forename quotes 👇

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

All funny forename quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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