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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Just a friendly reminder folks. Don’t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Only thing that can cure my depression is $500 million.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

I’ve arrived like the sun: blinding, necessary, and impossible to ignore.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

You ever spend the day with a skinny person and are like “ohhhh, that’s why you’re skinny”.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I wish I were a wild horse in Kazakhstan. That would fix everything.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2246 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,408

Funny Quotes Topics

15,116

Funny Quotes Images

12,408

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

Spotted on Slack:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

Trending via Slack:

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Reported on TikTok:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Making waves on YouTube:

I always like to remember the time before the internet. It was so good not to know how cruel and stupid humanity really is.

Going viral on TikTok:

Your honor, my client wasn’t trying to stab the victim. He was checking to see if he was cake.

Just shared via WeChat:

I miss them days if you couldn’t rap, you didn’t.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2246 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,408

Funny Quotes Topics

15,116

Funny Quotes Images

12,408

Updated

1 hour ago

Users Online

3,437

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

As an outsider, what’s your view on intelligence?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

Trending via Threads:

If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

Just landed via Slack:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Reported on Pinterest:

I have to pee. Story of my life.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Don’t invite me if there’s nowhere to sit down.

Trending via Slack:

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place wieners and/or cheese slices in your pockets, so the search dogs will find you first.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Single in the womb, single till the tomb!

Just landed via Facebook:

With a cat on your lap, you deal better with the crap.

Live now on Reddit:

At some point, my colleagues will manage to get me my own true crime documentary on Netflix.

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