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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

They expect me to work at work.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

I’ve never seen a McDonald’s or a Burger King under construction. They just show up.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

No one knows what I’m up to, not even me.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

It is so weird that every single one of us is going to die, and we are not nicer to each other.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,546

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,546

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,994

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on TikTok:

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

Breaking via WeChat:

Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

Breaking via Twitch:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Trending via Instagram:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Making waves on WeChat:

The way I see it, eating chips while I wait for my pizza to arrive is no different than ordering a starter in a restaurant.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Welcome to Twitter, some random, judgmental stranger will be along shortly to complain about your tweets.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Trending via Slack:

I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Shared recently on Instagram:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,546

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,546

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,559

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

Mondays are for pretending. Real work begins on Tuesday.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

She was my chai, I was her cake rusk.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Not really into dating right now, but very into flirting, and that’s where things get complicated.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Someone is probably in the worst argument of their life right now. LOL!

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

My future husband is probably enjoying a nice summer with his first wife… but the seeds of discontent are there.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The first sin in the Bible was eating an apple. The second was murder. That escalated quickly.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Guy who normally applauds when the plane lands right before the pilot crashes it: “Boo!”

Just landed via Facebook:

It’s nice to have a moment to breathe before reality knocks the wind out of you again.

Seen just now on Threads:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Just shared via Twitch:

The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

Breaking via WeChat:

Anyone who says there are no stupid questions is welcome to drop by my office. My colleagues will prove you wrong.

Going viral on X:

“I” before “E,” except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird, feisty, caffeinated weightlifters.

Breaking via Facebook:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

Trending via Reddit:

There’s a rhyming Italian expression for saying “take it or leave it” that goes “o mangi questa minestra o salti dalla finestra”. It means “either eat this soup or throw yourself out the window”.

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