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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Sorry I’m late, I got here as soon as I wanted to.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

That little pocket on jeans is the perfect size for the money I have left over after I pay all my bills.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

ADHD is: being pretty good at basically anything you want to be, and absolutely terrible at anything you need to do to live.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Dear God, make me a bird so I can fly. Fly far, far away and also so I can poop on people.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up, we had to manually roll up our car windows.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

If she replies to your sarcasm with more sarcasm, that’s a whole life.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,561

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I just hit the back arrow on a website, and it took me to a page that said, “Before you leave.” No. I already made the decision.

Breaking via Instagram:

My front facing camera got me looking like a failed science project.

Shared recently on X:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

Trending via WeChat:

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

Going viral on Slack:

“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”

Going viral on Slack:

I’m like Pooh Bear. I just want to eat, hang with my homies, and go around pantsless.

Just shared via Slack:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.

Trending via Reddit:

Bison may look friend-shaped, but they already have all the friends they want. Keep your distance and don’t make it awkward.

Funny King Kong quotes

New funny King Kong quotes 👇

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

0

2 months ago

able, better, building, city, funny observation, hide, hiding, hiding place, humor, irony, king, King Kong, kong, middle, movie, movie reference, new, New York City, observation, place, reference, tallest, tallest building, top, york

All funny King Kong quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on Snapchat this month:

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

78 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love surprising my metabolism. It never knows what’s coming—either absolute starvation or 1,000+ calories all at once.

100 shares on Slack this month:

Shopping is the only exercise I need.

60 shares on Threads this month:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

Being gracefully insane is the only way to survive life’s daily bullshit.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

41 shares on Threads this month:

During winter, it’s either lazy starvation or eight thousand calories in one sitting.

74 shares on Messenger this month:

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

19 shares on TikTok this month:

Good morning. I’m ready for attention now.

60 shares on X this month:

Flip me over like a cassette tape, and play me again.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Breakfast is the most important beer of the day.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Sending your selfies to NASA because you’re a star.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Not single, not dating, but a secret third thing (quantum entanglement).

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Snapchat:

It’s called a Caesar Salad because you stab it a bunch of times when you eat it.

Spotted on Discord:

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

Spotted on TikTok:

Adult life sucks. Friends don’t even ask to see how fast you can run in your new shoes anymore.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I’ll never understand why the volume in movies is always mixed in such a way that you can barely understand the dialog and your neighbor gets war flashbacks during action scenes.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

You only realize how heavy your handbag really is when your car tells you that your passenger is not wearing a seatbelt.

Live now on Discord:

Sometimes the voices in my head get bullied by the voices in my stomach.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

Making waves on Reddit:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Trending via Messenger:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

Just shared via Twitch:

If you scroll Twitter long enough, you too can burn calories by shaking your head.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny King Kong quotes

New funny King Kong quotes 👇

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

All funny King Kong quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨