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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

“What’s a random act of kindness you’ve done for a stranger recently?” I helped a bunch of teens buy alcohol and cigarettes the other day.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

There are two wolves inside me, but please no one tell my landlord.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Your email finds me deeply unwell. Teetering on the edge really.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Whoever named them fitting rooms has a lot of nerve.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

46 minutes ago

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Trending via YouTube:

The only thing I know about AI is, it desperately wants us to have more fingers.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Relationship status: he escaped.

Breaking via Threads:

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

Breaking via Messenger:

I like to put “No DMs” in my bio to pretend that I’m attractive.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Live now on Telegram:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I’m not enjoying this slow-burn apocalypse. I need it over and done like a popular Netflix show.

Trending via Slack:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I might look calm, but in my head I’ve punched you in the face three times.

Home » Funny Mama Quotes

Funny mama quotes

New funny mama quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Mama didn’t raise no fool, I turned into one all on my own.

Commentary:
"Looks like Mama's fool-proof plan had a clever twist! 🤪🃏 #SelfMadeFool #BlameItOnMyself"
6 months ago
Share →: My mama didn’t raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity.

Commentary:
Well, it seems like your mama unintentionally planted the seeds of irony in your garden of ambition! 🌱🔥 Sometimes striving for perfection can feel like sprinting in quicksand, right? 🏃‍♂️💨 But hey, settling for mediocrity is just another fancy term for "making peace with imperfection"! 😉👌 Don't worry, your mama's still proud – she just has a unique way of showing it! 🙌
6 months ago
Share →: My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

Commentary:
"Living with someone who just graduated from Hotel Mama – where the room service is unbeatable and the laundry magically does itself – can make you feel like you've suddenly become a one-person parent club! 🏨🧳🤷‍♀️ #SingleParentStruggles"

For even more funny mama quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny mama quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

46 minutes ago

3,428

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

“Date” is just another word for: Jeez, had I known that before, I would have stayed home.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Thanks for leaving my door open; I was running low on houseflies.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

There used to be many different names for the childhood game of knocking on doors and running away. But these days, it’s simply referred to as ‘being an Amazon driver’.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

I use a headshot from 2008 on my LinkedIn to prepare future employers for disappointment.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Patience: something you have when there are too many witnesses around.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Making waves on Discord:

They say it is hard to look at lips that you are not allowed to kiss. You do not know how hard it is to look at a face that you are not allowed to hit.

Seen just now on Reddit:

“This would be better if there was cake” really does ring true in any situation.

Shared recently on X:

For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

Trending via Facebook:

You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.

Seen just now on X:

I hate when I have dreams about work. I’m not getting paid to interact with these people on my time off!

Trending via TikTok:

Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.

Trending via YouTube:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Trending via Messenger:

Cheers erupt as woman cuts into perfectly ripe avocado.

Seen just now on Threads:

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

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