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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

I was really happy about it being Friday until I realized it was only Wednesday.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Spice up your meltdown through interpretive dance.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

The goal is never Gucci bags. It’s acres of land.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Living solo: where pants are optional, and snacks are unlimited.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

If I got $5 every time I thought of you, I would start thinking of you.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

If the USA is so great, why did someone make the USB?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,600

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

I took the first step towards cleaning out my closet today. I went in there and looked it over good.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

Going viral on Pinterest:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

Just landed via Telegram:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Just shared via Slack:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Spotted on Slack:

She’s got style, she’s got grace, she crams french fries in her face.

Going bananas on Slack:

A quick shoutout to all of the sidewalks out there… Thanks for keeping me off the streets.

Breaking via Instagram:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

Live now on Reddit:

You ever notice how when you get home from food shopping, the kids turn into airport security?

Funny mental cycle quotes

New funny mental cycle quotes 👇

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

2 days ago

balance, before, care, cycle, education, good, health, humor, idea, life, mental, mental cycle, mental health, putting, self, self-care, stress, student, student life

All funny mental cycle quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on Slack this month:

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

71 shares on Pinterest this month:

Prepare your kids for social media by putting their artwork on the fridge and writing a bunch of mean comments under it.

17 shares on Threads this month:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

84 shares on X this month:

Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.

81 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

31 shares on Slack this month:

The title of my autobiography is going to be ‘You’d Think I’d Learn By Now, But Nope.’

26 shares on YouTube this month:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

96 shares on X this month:

For whom the Fetty Waps.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

I’m addicted to placebos.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Cutting my steak at Texas Roadhouse with my car keys.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

Horse girls and cat ladies get all the attention, but what about crow women?

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

They should make a biopic of just some random guy.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Well, at least my cat is supportive of me doing less and laying around more.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

70% of marriage is yelling “What” from a different room.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

If craziness could fly, some people would have their own airport.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

I always stop the microwave before it beeps because it’s not the boss of me.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Giving people access to the internet was a massive mistake.

Trending via TikTok:

Told my boss I was going to the bathroom but didn’t say which one. Now I’m at home.

Just landed via Slack:

ChatGPT’s primary use is to generate plausible excuses to leave dinner at the in-laws’.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Breaking via Messenger:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Just landed via Telegram:

Cheer up! Your biggest mistake is probably still ahead of you.

Seen just now on Telegram:

People who remember to drink water, what’s that like?

Freshly posted on Instagram:

It’s a good friend who, when you want the truth, knows what truth you want.

Seen just now on TikTok:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny mental cycle quotes

New funny mental cycle quotes 👇

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

All funny mental cycle quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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