Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

I started my diet 2 hours ago, I’m glad that’s over.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Yesterday, my boss asked me what I did for a living.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I wish I loved anything as much as my two year old loves pulling my pants down.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

A fabric tomato filled with needles. Don’t see that much anymore.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

It’s so foggy outside. Y’all gotta stop vaping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,401

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Shared recently on X:

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

Just landed via TikTok:

Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

Seen just now on Threads:

It’s completely absurd that Silicon Valley is pushing AI on us before they figured out how to keep fries fresh for longer.

Trending via TikTok:

I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Trending via Facebook:

Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

Just landed via YouTube:

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

Spotted on YouTube:

Body by sandwich.

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Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on X this month:

Discord is only good for calling friends on the computer. Please do not waste your time getting caught up in random servers.

74 shares on WeChat this month:

The cinema vibe is my favorite, you literally forget about the world for like 2-3 hours.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

47 shares on Discord this month:

The medicine for headache goes to the stomach to do what, exactly?

40 shares on Facebook this month:

After my funeral, I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone, “Thanks for coming.”

84 shares on Reddit this month:

According to the smoke alarm, the food is ready.

20 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ruining the Olympics for my fiancée by, every time they mention Paris, saying, “that’s where Ratatouille lived”.

55 shares on YouTube this month:

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

57 shares on TikTok this month:

You can make friends in a doctor’s waiting room as long as you have something broken and not something coughing.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

One of the benefits of being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas, no make-up, and look like crap and I won’t judge you.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Telling your parents about your problems is like adding another problem to your life.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

This email could’ve been sex.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

An internship is only unpaid if you don’t steal enough.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate apps that shut off your music when you open them, like how fu*king important do you think you are?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m growing a mullet so no one will want to hangout with me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,509

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

You can chill with someone a whole day at the university, and never see them again in your life, lol.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

My parents didn’t raise me to order something expensive when someone else is paying.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

My sister: snowboards. My brother: skateboards. Me: charcuterie boards.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Slack:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Just shared via Snapchat:

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

Just shared via Threads:

So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.

Trending via TikTok:

Every day Facebook tells me I have memories and wants to show them to me. It’s like they have no appreciation for the cost or the amount of liquor I needed to erase them.

Freshly posted on X:

I’m gonna get my vasectomy done at Home Depot like a real man.

Going viral on WeChat:

I have thought one billion times about everything.

Breaking via Slack:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Trending via Threads:

I may be a beginner at some things, but I have a black belt in shopping.

Just landed via Discord:

Being called by your real name in a relationship kinda sounds like a divorce.

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