Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Remember: when a band skips your city on tour, it is always personal and they always hate you specifically.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I love sleeping in fishnets. Makes you feel like a big honey roast ham.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

All my bills say “Outstanding.” I guess I am good to go.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2435 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,597

Funny Quotes Topics

15,266

Funny Quotes Images

12,597

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

Making waves on Discord:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

Spotted on Telegram:

I will never trust a cake transport box enough to just hold it by the handle.

Just landed via Messenger:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Trending via Reddit:

Don’t give up on your dreams. Go back to bed.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.

Live now on Discord:

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

Trending via Discord:

Friday the 13th doesn’t even feel creepy cause bad things happen everyday now.

Just landed via Discord:

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Just shared via Snapchat:

How do I become a billionaire by 9 a.m. Monday? Please, it’s urgent.

Home » Funny No Weirdos Quotes

Funny no weirdos quotes

New funny no weirdos quotes 👇

For even more funny no weirdos quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny no weirdos quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2435 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,597

Funny Quotes Topics

15,266

Funny Quotes Images

12,597

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Old people be like “no elbows on the table, it’s rude” then say something racist.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

My kidnappers sent me back early with a full apology, some money, and several of their fingers.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

My life would be pointless without cheese. Or as the famous song goes: “Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone!”

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

A house doesn’t have to be haunted to scare me, I’ve seen the listing prices.

Just shared via Telegram:

Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

Seen just now on Messenger:

At some point, I need to admit my ‘guilty pleasure’ music taste is just my music taste now.

Trending via Slack:

Sorry, I just saw your text from last night. Are you guys still at the restaurant?

Making waves on WhatsApp:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

Trending via WhatsApp:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

Freshly posted on X:

If we’re not supposed to be snacking late at night why is there a light in the fridge?

Trending via Snapchat:

I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴