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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

It’s a good friend who, when you want the truth, knows what truth you want.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Countries are just gangs with paperwork.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Oh, I have Christmas spirit. The question is: Do I mix it with coke or do I drink it neat?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

What’s said in the blanket fort, stays in the blanket fort.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Every time I blink, it’s Monday again. I can’t live like this.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I only look up to people that are taller than me and really that’s about the extent of it.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

Live now on TikTok:

Seeing my kids getting along, laughing, and peacefully playing together is the best minute of my day.

Making waves on WeChat:

Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Just landed via Messenger:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Whatever y’all heard about me, I’m way worse.

Making waves on Twitch:

Sex is cool, but have you ever found an academic article that fits your research topic perfectly and supports all of your claims?

Shared recently on Messenger:

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

I’m already excited about who I’m going to think sucks first today.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

The world would be a much nicer place if we just turn off the news.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

If I’m ever in a coma, please put chapstick on my lips.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

When I say “I hate drama”, I mean I hate being involved in drama. Other people’s drama? Big fan!

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

Doing nothing is very hard to do. You never know when you’re finished.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Are you in love with me yet or do I have to post another Spotify link?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If I’m ever on life support, unplug me, then plug me back in. See if that works.

Shared recently on TikTok:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I was having a great Friday until I found out it was Thursday.

Just shared via Twitch:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Going viral on YouTube:

One year closer to whatever age my obituary will say.

Going viral on Messenger:

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

Just shared via Slack:

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

The one thing to know about me is I always get the last laugh. And oh yes, it’s maniacal.

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