Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Incorrectly is the only word that, when spelled correctly, is still spelled incorrectly.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Who called it a heatwave and not a temperature tantrum?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

People will say stuff like “Well, at least if WWIII happens, I won’t have to go to work…” I think in your heart you know that’s not true.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Are there cheat codes for parenting teenagers? This level is really hard.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

The only thing stopping cheesecake from being a breakfast food is you.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

No longer praying on your downfall. I will be directly involved.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

I know I’m mad when I start talking to myself about it.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

What part of “I need to save money” do I not understand?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,845

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

McDonald’s will “anything else” you to death. Can you wait a McMinute?

Making waves on Facebook:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Shared recently on Threads:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

Going bananas on Discord:

The second cup of coffee does for me what a can of spinach does for Popeye.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Live now on Slack:

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Making waves on YouTube:

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

Spotted on Discord:

Do not take me to an escape room. I was a c-section. Someone is gonna have to come get me.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

We’re all naughty, some just more than others.

Home » Funny Parental Quotes

Funny parental quotes

Funny parental quotes bring a dose of laughter 😄 to the wild ride of raising kids! From sleepless nights 💤 to unexpected messes 🎨, these witty lines capture the chaos and joy of parenthood perfectly. Whether you’re a new mom, dad, or just need a chuckle 🤪, these gems remind us that sometimes, the best way to survive parenting is with a big smile and a sense of humor! 😂✨

New funny parental quotes 👇

All funny parental quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

21 shares on Snapchat this month:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

Decorated the house across the street so I can look out the window and enjoy my handiwork.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

You’re mistaking me with someone who’s stupid.

99 shares on X this month:

I’m so talented I can not only spill food on my clothes but I can get it on yours too.

73 shares on WeChat this month:

Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.

89 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Online shopping gives me a reason to live for another 3-5 business days.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Deja poo is when you feel like you’ve heard the same shit before.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so hot the chipmunks are using my bird bath as a hot tub and requesting mimosas and the brunch menu.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Whatever doesn’t kill you is probably still trying.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Behind every robot that turns evil is an engineer who specifically installed red LEDs into the eyes just for this scenario.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Girl, are you an Uber driver? Because you are driving me to drink.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Seriously, how sexy was Freud’s mom?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s all up in arms about how undemocratic the electoral college is and yet we let our weather be decided by a single unelected groundhog.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My credit score is a family of raccoons hissing over a McRib.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

You can always tell it’s Monday because nobody’s smiling.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,774

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

I hate when a guy asks “can you cook?” Can you build a house?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

You look like the kind of person whose recorded calls have been used for training purposes.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I am “I can’t remember the last time I went out on New Year’s Eve” old.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

No ChatGPT for me, thanks. I will be asking Liam Gallagher on Twitter.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Imagine earning a science degree then having to be a meteorologist who announces the prophecy of a groundhog.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

I’m professionally employed and personally unhinged. Balance.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’m already ready to clock out from work tomorrow.

Just shared via Telegram:

Messages are way funnier when you know how the person talks.

Spotted on Telegram:

One of the voices in my head brought up an excellent point, so obviously he had to go.

Just shared via Messenger:

I’m still tired from yesterday’s tired.

Going viral on X:

Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

Going bananas on Facebook:

I love talkative cats. Like, yeah, bro. Meow, meow! You’re so right.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Lady just asked me what “mansplaining” is. I think it’s a trap. We’ve been staring at each other in silence for half an hour.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Trending via Messenger:

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

A girl, her bed, and TV series on a Friday evening is a true love story.

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