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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Group projects taught me how to do everything alone and trust no one.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Some of you need to clean your room before you take a selfie.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, can you give it a really good massage?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Sperm me would be swimming in the other direction.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

You know you’re the father of teen boys when a shoe print on the ceiling no longer fazes you.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

774 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,936

Funny Quotes Topics

13,910

Funny Quotes Images

10,936

Updated

57 minutes ago

Users Online

3,420

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

If we’re walking together, just know I’ll definitely bump into you because I can’t walk in a straight line.

Making waves on TikTok:

Everyone’s a gangster until their doorbell rings.

Live now on Instagram:

An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

Trending via X:

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Growing old is a process of saying “it’s probably nothing,” with increasing frequency and increasingly being wrong.

Making waves on X:

When exactly does wisdom kick in? I feel like I’m just getting older.

Making waves on TikTok:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Going viral on Threads:

Girls really only want one simple thing; and that one thing is all of your attention.

Just shared via TikTok:

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

774 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,936

Funny Quotes Topics

13,910

Funny Quotes Images

10,936

Updated

57 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

You want fast replies from a female? Argue with her!

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

My yoga instructor was drunk today. Put me in a very awkward position.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Taking off my house pajamas to put on my errands pajamas.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Hello taxi, off to Friday please. Money doesn’t matter!

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

I dreamed I won the lottery, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up and get ready for work.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Podcasts are like babies, they’re too easy to create and not everyone should have one.

Just shared via Reddit:

The only squat I’m even considering doing today is diddly.

Just shared via TikTok:

Today is the Mondayest Thursday that has ever been mistaken for a Friday in the history of Wednesdays.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Maybe your soulmate’s just late, like, wildly behind schedule.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”

Trending via WhatsApp:

Ugh, he wants to go hiking as a first date, just like Hitler.

Reported on Facebook:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Just landed via Discord:

I’m at the age where drinking a cup of coffee now makes me feel like Popeye scarfing down a can of spinach.

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