Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I am a man, a man with a cold, so I guess this is goodbye.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

He was only called Mr. Pepper until he published his groundbreaking research on fizzics.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

I don’t like who I become when I’m watching someone Google something less efficiently than I would myself.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

If you think I’m rude, you should hear the voices in my head.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

My ideal vacation would be to drop my family off at the airport and then have a week of peace and quiet.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,354

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

Has someone told the whales that they can’t sing?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to stay up all night.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

Just shared via Threads:

I don’t give people directions. What if no one wants them there?

Spotted on X:

Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I’m done with work.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Dying and being reincarnated as a beetle, and crawling to my old body’s grave, and digging down and living in my old ribcage.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I have been alive all my life, and have not once seen a Chinese food commercial.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Do you think protein wants to be in all these things?

Funny self-discipline quotes

Funny self-discipline quotes sprinkle a little humor on the serious art of staying focused 🎯😄. They remind us that while self-control can be tough, laughing at our own struggles makes the journey way more fun 🚀😂. Ready to get motivated and chuckle at the same time? Let’s dive into some witty words that prove discipline doesn’t have to be boring! 🎉💪

New funny self-discipline quotes 👇

All funny self-discipline quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Instagram this month:

Yes, I do talk to myself, everyone else just wants to argue with me.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

13 shares on Threads this month:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

17 shares on YouTube this month:

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

71 shares on WeChat this month:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

38 shares on Instagram this month:

He took my last fry, your honor.

30 shares on Telegram this month:

Googling symptoms until you cry.

61 shares on Reddit this month:

Rather than work on my issues, I’m counting on my personality getting changed by a falling coconut.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

You either get a kid who eats like a bottomless pit, or you get one that when asked what they want for lunch answers “No thanks, I had lunch yesterday.”

74 shares on Telegram this month:

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent more hobbies for people without skills or patience.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so hungry, I could eat my own cooking.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Not right now. I’m manifesting.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at that age where someone can call me the wrong name and I’m just like “whatever, I’ll be Dan for a minute”.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate texting. Just hunt me like an animal.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You can mess up big time letting someone know you have a printer.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The egg doesn’t swim to the sperm, girl. Never chase a man.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,292

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Being an adult is when you ask the babysitter when you should be home.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

I don’t want to stand, Apple Watch. You stand.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Socks try to be monogamous, but most end up either single or having multiple different partners.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

A person becomes 10 times more attractive not by their looks but by photoshop.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

There must be an invisible mechanism on my book. Every time I open it, my husband starts trying to talk to me.

Seen just now on X:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

Making waves on X:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Trending via X:

Toddlers: I’ve licked everything so everything is mine now.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

Breaking via Pinterest:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not so sure anymore.

Just landed via WeChat:

I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I’m buysexual, you buy me food, I become sexual.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴