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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

If anything goes wrong today, just dramatically whisper, “The prophecy has been fulfilled,” and walk away.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

When I was a kid, I had to walk to Netflix.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

There is nothing like a little tomato soup to soothe the soul, even if it’s cold, over ice, with a celery stalk and vodka.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

The longest and most adventurous journeys begin with the words: “I know a shortcut.”

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Lego bricks are classic educational toys. You step on them once and you can do ballet.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1850 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,012

Funny Quotes Topics

14,810

Funny Quotes Images

12,012

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Messenger:

Just because talking is for you doesn’t mean that starting a podcast is.

Going viral on X:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Spotted on X:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Making waves on Instagram:

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

Spotted on Facebook:

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

Just shared via YouTube:

Donating blood today to make room for more food.

Trending via Discord:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Just shared via TikTok:

Don’t donate your plasma. It’s a big scam and they’re just using it to make TVs.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

A web developer and an SEO expert walk into a bar, bars, nightclub, pubs, tavern, beer, alcohol, drinks, alcoholic beverages, bars in my area, places to drink.

Just shared via Telegram:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1850 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,012

Funny Quotes Topics

14,810

Funny Quotes Images

12,012

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

That awkward moment when you spend an hour online picking out a gift for your friend’s son’s birthday and Amazon tells you it’s been a year since you bought this item.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

I wear sunglasses when I’m driving so nobody knows I’m asleep.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

If you’re going to walk in my shoes, please also wear my FitBit.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

When someone says “I expected more of you”, I’m always like “well who’s fault is that?”

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

My future wife is probably fake laughing at her boyfriend’s lame jokes right now. Be patient, Queen, a true clown is on the way.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

My life coach traded me.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

Live now on Messenger:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

If you drink a lot of water, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy looking for a bathroom.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

“I have a favourite hole”, me, at the pool table.

Just landed via Pinterest:

The first time people saw a train coming at them, they ran away in terror.

Seen just now on Discord:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Making waves on TikTok:

Off to my crying appointment (therapy).

Seen just now on Twitch:

I’ve spent 80% of my adult life resetting my password.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

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