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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Sharpening pencils at the bin was the biggest link-up.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

I’ll be like “I’m fine” then shake my leg at 150 mph.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

As a kid, I was worried about randomly disappearing into the Bermuda Triangle forever. As an adult, I’m wondering how I can actually make that happen.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

The umbrella was going to be called brella, but the inventor hesitated.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I’m not flirting with you. I’m just funny and you think you like me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

Just landed via Slack:

I’m the ick in fantastic.

Just shared via Threads:

The concept of warding off vampires with crosses is so interesting to me. I wonder if it applies to any other religion or if they’re allergic to just Catholicism.

Spotted on WeChat:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

Spotted on Reddit:

I don’t want to brag or anything, but I can still fit in the earrings I wore in high school.

Just landed via X:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

Shared recently on Instagram:

The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

When you say “You’re going to hate me for this,” you’re making a very large assumption that I don’t hate you already.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I’m experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep everyone away, whatever their profession.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I’m not even sure what I’m doing on this planet.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Human interaction is a great way to learn all the new swear words your subconscious mind has come up with in the lab.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m feeling very anxious. I think this 7th mug of coffee will take the edge off.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Chocolate doesn’t ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

Just shared via TikTok:

A little sign under the doorbell that says, “think twice, adventurer.”

Trending via Instagram:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!

Reported on Facebook:

Please don’t interrupt me when I’m trying to overhear something.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

The masculine urge to hitch your pants up after making a minor decision.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I know it’s true because the people on the internet said so.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

A driver that delivers Indian food is called a curryer.

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