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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

And is your “sparkling personality” in the room with us now?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Sending your selfies to NASA because you’re a star.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Elect a clown, expect a circus.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Babymaking music but it’s the Benny Hill theme song.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m not easily offended, but I am easily annoyed.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,928

Funny Quotes Topics

14,744

Funny Quotes Images

11,928

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Reported on Pinterest:

Bro to bro: Never get your haircut on the day of a special event.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

Breaking via Facebook:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Freshly posted on Threads:

The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

Making waves on WeChat:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

Broadcasted on X:

This bouncer’s lucky I’m with my lady and physically frightened of him or he’d be in a world of pain.

Broadcasted on Slack:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Seen just now on X:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

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Funny textbook cover quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,928

Funny Quotes Topics

14,744

Funny Quotes Images

11,928

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I’ve never been to hell, but I once forgot to buy batteries for the toys on Christmas morning. The sound is still ringing in my ears.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

How many of y’all are “burn a CD” and “lime wire” old?

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Current relationship status: sleeping diagonally across the bed.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

I’m slowly becoming an adult. Please make it stop.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

If you’re reading a book in public, you better be on at least page 140 or something.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Hundreds, nay, thousands of movies about falling in love but only one movie about a beach that makes you old.

Reported on Instagram:

Insomniacs who are not afraid of the dark have nighty-night problems but the pitch ain’t one.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Whoever named them fitting rooms has a lot of nerve.

Making waves on X:

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

Just shared via WeChat:

Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

Making waves on Slack:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Being a girl must be so easy. All you do is cry all day and text 10 different guys.

Spotted on Threads:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Spotted on Twitch:

If insomnia were a sport, I’d have endorsement deals.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

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