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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

I can’t wait to get married so I can bring home unnecessary stuff and get yelled at for it.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

There is a grave concern that this post will produce zero likes.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Humanity doesn’t deserve a new year, look at the mess they made of the last one.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,677

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Having long hair as a guy is so scary because some days I look like the charming lead of a classic film from the 80s, and other days I look like a Discord mod that runs his Magic: The Gathering group like the Navy.

Breaking via Twitch:

This Dollar Tree energy drink has me seeing colors that aren’t available to the naked eye, yet.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

An agenda reveal party, where I surprise everyone with all the things I hope to accomplish this weekend.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions. Like Wednesday.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m not super into getting older but I do like how nobody asks me to help them move anymore.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If the number 666 is considered evil, then technically, 25.8069758 is the root of all evil.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

Going viral on Twitch:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Funny textbook cover quotes

New funny textbook cover quotes 👇

Did anyone else use grocery bags as textbook covers, or was I just that poor?

2 months ago

anyone, bag, bags, cover, else, grocery, grocery bag, humor, i, just, nostalgia, poor, poverty, school, textbook, textbook cover

All funny textbook cover quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t rise and shine. I caffeinate and hope.

66 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t know the difference between “gray” & “grey” and I’m too scared to even ask.

90 shares on Twitch this month:

We need a word for a type of person who spends all their time working to live in a city so they can be near cool things, but they don’t actually like going out.

99 shares on Instagram this month:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, sleeping for work, getting ready for work, or thinking about work.

90 shares on Threads this month:

I just wish I had the confidence of my husband who thinks everything only takes 5 minutes.

91 shares on Reddit this month:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

37 shares on Discord this month:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

What a bleak life it must be if you’ve never had a drink shoot through your nose when you laugh.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

If you’re alone on Thanksgiving, venmo me $25 and I’ll call and ask you when are you gonna get a “real” job and give me grandchildren.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

If I delete a tweet, I should disappear with it.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Them: “Ugh, could you be more annoying?” Me: “Oh God, yes!”

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

“Can my boyfriend come?” Will he contribute to our conversation, at least one question?

Live now on Reddit:

I think one quality that makes me incredibly attractive is that I keep my mouth shut when I have nothing to say.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I will restart the entire song if you talk over my favorite part.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

Making waves on TikTok:

Not to brag, but I’m on hold and my call is important to them.

Making waves on Telegram:

If you see me in public, it’s AI.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Don’t worry. Artificial intelligence will never replace actual ignorance.

Breaking via Twitch:

My self-care routine is mostly just going to Mexican restaurants.

Making waves on Telegram:

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Getting road rage alone in my house.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny textbook cover quotes

New funny textbook cover quotes 👇

Did anyone else use grocery bags as textbook covers, or was I just that poor?

All funny textbook cover quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨