Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

You either get a kid who eats like a bottomless pit, or you get one that when asked what they want for lunch answers “No thanks, I had lunch yesterday.”

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

And is this “year-end bonus” in the room with us right now?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Intro to salsa class was weird, I starved myself all day, there was no chips or dips and then these weirdos were all grabby and dancing around.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer to the end you get, the faster it goes.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I hate when I turn off my brights for an incoming vehicle and then realize it’s a Cybertruck.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,713

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

Shared recently on Slack:

I can’t believe I slept good all night. What a rush.

Live now on Instagram:

If you think my posts are horrid, wait until you see the live stream of my colonoscopy.

Broadcasted on Threads:

If it doesn’t get a like in the first two years, I delete it.

Going bananas on Facebook:

The peace of not knowing.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

93 shares on Snapchat this month:

I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.

15 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

91 shares on Discord this month:

I can’t afford a vehicle with wing doors, so I buy the Tupperware with lids which open that way.

93 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

Optimist: The glass is ½ full. Pessimist: The glass is ½ empty. Excel: The glass is January 2nd.

49 shares on Messenger this month:

Catching me in person is rare. I move like a ghost.

49 shares on Telegram this month:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

“Grey’s Anatomy” but it’s told entirely through the lens of the hospital’s HR department.

90 shares on Messenger this month:

Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

23 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You are not obligated to post a video of yourself dancing.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The gothic urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a terrifying backstory.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I caught your husband cheating on you at an Alanis concert, and thought you, you, you oughta know.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

The word Ohio looks like a tractor.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

“I’m at a point in my life where my favorite thing to do is nothing.”

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

When you accidentally laugh at your own thoughts, and now people are staring.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Just saw a piece of jewelry made in the 80s described as “vintage,” so I’ll be laying down the rest of the day.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

I be like “communication is the key” then put my phone on do not disturb.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

To think that billions in venture capital have been deployed because it was annoying to copy and paste from ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I tiptoe near my medicine cabinet because I don’t want to wake my sleeping pills.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

ChatGPT, what do you do when you find out your boyfriend’s been using ChatGPT to write you messages?

Trending via WhatsApp:

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

Live now on YouTube:

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

Making waves on Instagram:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Just shared via X:

I need a chiropractor for my brain.

Going viral on TikTok:

Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

Just landed via WeChat:

The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

Trending via X:

Most people in your life will come and go but occasionally you’ll meet someone really special who makes you contemplate murder.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

Trending via Facebook:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

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