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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can’t sleep.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Wow, I absolutely love your outfit. The black really brings out the pet hair on it.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

We’re all naughty, some just more than others.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

I used to be cool, but now I just can’t wait to get on the couch by 7 p.m., in my pajamas, with a quilted blanket.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Sorry, the deadline for complaints was yesterday.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

We can’t all be underemployed creatives. Someone in the group chat needs to know what an insurance is.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,553

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,553

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

4,019

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via X:

Before social media, you had to actively go out and find crazy people.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Going on dates is hard because do I like them or do I just have sooo much fun being me.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Egyptians did pretty well for a civilization that wrote entirely in emoji.

Just shared via Slack:

My Mom say that everyone has a beautiful side, so I guess I’m a circle.

Seen just now on Discord:

I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

90s scientists: we cloned a sheep! we landed a robot on Mars! Scientists today: for the last time, the Earth is *round*.

Going viral on Messenger:

Our childhood photos might be ugly but those smiles were definitely not fake.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

Making waves on Slack:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,553

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,553

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,862

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Grateful to be living in the “Tetris when it’s going too fast and blocks are helplessly piling up” era of human history.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

I travel like I’m rich, then eat like I’m broke.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

My kids didn’t follow me into the bathroom so now I’m scared to leave and find out what they got into instead.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

I’ve learned a lot over the years, but the best advice I can ever give someone is never buy a used harmonica.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

I hate it when my AirPods die instead of me.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I remember when my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? And I told him everyone knows he doesn’t hire stupid people.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that cake is in the fridge.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they don’t know what it means.

Seen just now on Slack:

Ah yes, my abandonment issues due to all the abandonment.

Shared recently on Slack:

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Going bananas on Telegram:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Seen just now on Threads:

So many people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Welcome to your 50s, your joints are now meteorologists.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Wow, this was a really long day of playing on my phone.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Ironically people who are good at giving advice find it difficult to follow their own.

Just landed via X:

Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

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