Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Having a girlfriend who doesn’t post herself on social media is an underrated blessing.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

I usually decompose after work rather than decompress.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

The billionaires have decided that the people with nothing have too much.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Celery is 95% water and 100% not pizza.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

If I ever look at my phone in the middle of a conversation with you, I’m not reading a text; I’m just looking up the definition of a word I just used a bit too confidently.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

I’m in a comfy dress today, but I look like a potato in floral. Call me Nelly Flortato.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,325

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

Reading about two insects who fall in love in Italy. It’s a Rome ants novel.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’

Spotted on WeChat:

The possibility of monsters residing underneath your bed is negated when the mattress is positioned on the floor.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

Live now on Telegram:

My husband is the do-it-yourself type. I asked him to take out the garbage and he said, “do it yourself.”

Going viral on Facebook:

McDonald’s needs a 3rd window so you can trade in all the wrong stuff they gave you.

Just landed via Slack:

If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

My savings account has been empty for so long that a Spirit Halloween just opened up inside it.

Making waves on Telegram:

The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

Trending via Facebook:

Why would a needle be in a haystack, anyway?

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

0
Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, darkness, always fashionably late to the party! 🕶️⌛ But hey, better late than never, right? Who knew evening attire was so punctual! 😄🌙 #FashionablyLate #NightOwl"

, , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t know the difference between “gray” & “grey” and I’m too scared to even ask.

17 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

You cannot trust me at a zoo because I’ll release the animals.

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Humanity doesn’t always make a compelling case for its continued existence.

43 shares on Facebook this month:

Cataclysmic events, such as your fingers on my skin.

69 shares on WeChat this month:

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

21 shares on Twitch this month:

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

82 shares on Snapchat this month:

If, I, want to, put, a comma, there, then, I will put, the comma, there.

20 shares on Facebook this month:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

23 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If Microsoft Edge is brave enough to ask to be your default browser, you can be brave enough to ask that girl out.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If you can’t look back at your younger self and realize that you were an idiot, you are probably still an idiot.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve discovered that my visiting family members leave crumbs in the butter. Please keep me in your thoughts during this difficult time.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I really want a family… sized bag of peanut butter M&Ms.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Introducing two cats is tedium. Not interested in your dumb politics just lick each other and be normal already.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Having to confirm your past purchases over the phone with your bank’s fraud department is a truly harrowing moment of self-examination for chronic little treat buyers.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I know everything is expensive right now, but just remember correcting people’s grammar online is still free.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

238 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,507

Funny Quotes Topics

17,572

Funny Quotes Images

15,507

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,641

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Who you are when someone reaches over to take food from your plate… is the real you.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Caesar, looking shocked: “Is it bring your knife to work day or something?”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

If I worked for UPS, there would be a 100% chance I’m falling out that open door when I turn a corner too fast.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Hair is unwashed, so I obviously feel like I’m fundamentally unlovable.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

I am such a fun person and so easy to get along with as long as the layout I have secretly imagined for the entire day goes exactly as I planned it without variation or interruption.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera!

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I can’t believe bedtime used to be a punishment.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Horse girls and cat ladies get all the attention, but what about crow women?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

I hate it when I gain 20 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Just shared via Discord:

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

Making waves on Messenger:

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Breaking via YouTube:

Explaining myself is too much work. Please just judge me.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Going viral on Telegram:

If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Uber sends notifications like “Hey, want to take an Uber right now?” No thanks, buddy. It’s more for when I need to go somewhere.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I miss when my hardest decision was Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network.

Making waves on Telegram:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴