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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Stop animal testing! Use my ex!

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

A genie that does my bidding would fix me.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

I don’t have any rizz but I do have snacks in my purse.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

20 minutes ago

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Can’t. I’m busy taking this Buzzfeed quiz to find out what kind of potato I am.

Just shared via Slack:

I left the house with wet hair and no makeup on, so I’m sure I’ll run into everyone I know.

Just landed via Telegram:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Spotted on X:

Cannabis has many benefits. For example, it makes you retarded. But in addition, it also makes you lazy. No worries though, it also makes you fat and insane.

Just landed via WeChat:

I was always told to eat all my food so that I’d grow to be big and strong. When exactly does the strong part kick in?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Why would I want a memory pillow? Sleep is where I go to forget.

Going viral on Messenger:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

Just landed via Discord:

At my age, a trail of clothes leading to the bedroom, means I dropped them on the way from the dryer.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Broadcasted on X:

If a girl sends you selfies and you don’t compliment her, she should be allowed to electrocute you.

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

5 months ago

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Absolutely! 🎉🔨 Imagine the sheer joy on their faces as they blow out the candles on a power tool-themed cake, surrounded by a backdrop of endless possibilities on the shelves of Home Depot. Just think of the party favors – tiny paint swatches, keychain tape measures, and of course, personalized hard hats for all the guests. 🎂🛠 Who needs a party venue when you can celebrate your special day aisle by aisle, right? 😄 #AgeIs

40, activity, birthday, birthday party, celebration, depot, fun, fun activity, home, Home Depot, humor, men, over, over 40, party, should, store, stores

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

20 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

If you’re looking for a quiet place to talk to yourself, my DMs are open.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

It’s so cool when people who write for a living admit that they don’t read books or have thoughts.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

I only look up to people that are taller than me and really that’s about the extent of it.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Anyone who thinks office jobs are harmless has never cut their finger on paper.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

“You’re so self-aware!” Thanks, it’s ruining my life.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I don’t simply want to kill a mosquito; I want to bite them back over and over to make them itch.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

When I take a shower I’m: 5% cleaning myself, 10% singing, 85% making life changing decisions.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Since emojis have been around, I finally have a rough idea of how women feel when they don’t know what to wear.

Going viral on Telegram:

It’s funny how quickly you become difficult if you don’t always just say “yes”.

Trending via Instagram:

How about hold me as tight as you’re holding onto that grudge?

Making waves on Facebook:

The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Using my one phone call to call Santa.

Just landed via Slack:

Everyone has these three colleagues: The one who is always cold. The one who is always hungry. The one who is always tired. I am everything in one.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Making waves on Instagram:

The crematorium is my last hope for a hot body.

Just shared via Telegram:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Seen just now on YouTube:

There’s no one I respect more than duck hunters. You spent $15,000 on a camouflage boat to outsmart a duck.

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