Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Memories are a bit fuzzy – but regrets? They’re in 8K and Dolby Vision.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

I’m at the age where unnecessary noise be pissing me off.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

AirBnB is fun for when you want to be financially abused by a stranger with a binder filled with rules.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

I told my suitcase we wouldn’t be going on vacation this year; now it’s dead inside and I’m left with emotional baggage.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,254

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Slack:

I am thick and tired.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Welcome to Twitter, where everyone is an expert on everything.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Three wise men? I highly doubt that.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My boss just left which means I have finished all of my work for the day.

Making waves on Twitch:

I don’t go crazy. I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Bison may look friend-shaped, but they already have all the friends they want. Keep your distance and don’t make it awkward.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Lego bricks are classic educational toys. You step on them once and you can do ballet.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The gym gives you energy, but you need energy to get to the gym. Feels like a pyramid scheme, if you ask me.

Just shared via Discord:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Spotted on Twitch:

Work from home is all fun and games until you lose grip on reality.

How does a government that takes 40% of everyone’s money end up being trillions in debt?

2 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like the government skipped its "Budgeting for Dummies" class! 📚🤦‍♂️💸

40, being, debt, economy, end, finance, government, humor, irony, money, tax

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

0

2 months ago

assistance, bored, boredom, help, helping, humor, sarcasm, search, sure, translation, turn
This is about the time of year where my enthusiasm about shoveling snow turns into “it will probably melt on it’s own”.

0

2 months ago

enthusiasm, humor, melt, own, procrastination, seasonal, shoveling, snow, time, weather, where, winter, year
Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

0

2 months ago

after, coworker, flirtation, hit, humor, i, joke, just, know, let, lucky, lucky man, man, picture, saw, sleep, want, wife, workplace
At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

0

2 months ago

agree, agreement, amazing, bra, clothing, comfort, feeling, humor, least, men, relief, take, thing, women
My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

0

2 months ago

bar, beer, beers, consumption, furniture, Gjörfbunkle, humor, i, IKEA, least, meant, opinion, purchase, shopping, should, think, three
Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

0

2 months ago

dark, dark mode, discomfort, humor, i, mode, much, physically, preferences, repulsion, screen, technology, used, visual, visual discomfort, white, white screen

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

The secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life.

66 shares on X this month:

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m nervous that my diet pill will stick in my throat, so I usually eat a few cookies after to help push it down.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

I hate when I’m typing away, expecting autocorrect to have my back, and I look down and just see awjdbdmkskan.

76 shares on Telegram this month:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

44 shares on Discord this month:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

46 shares on TikTok this month:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

The most I’ve ever spent on a bottle of wine is about 45 minutes.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Moms be like, “I needed this,” and it’s really just a break from being the one who holds it all together every single day.

41 shares on Snapchat this month:

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

You have hopes and dreams. I have nopes and screams.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

I crashed my bike in 1989 and hurt my knee real bad. We didn’t have social media back then so I’m telling you guys now.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

If I had a bf, I’d be a gf.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Not all who wander are lost. Some are just moms. In Target. Hiding from their children.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Anyone who deals with customers on a professional basis should be allowed to hand out one face slap per day.

Just shared via Messenger:

Going to ragebait men by asking, “Do you ever wish you were tall?”

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Does anyone else stare at the dead body in movies to see if you can catch them breathing?

Seen just now on YouTube:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I bring a sort of “this isn’t actually urgent” vibe to the workplace that managers don’t like.

Making waves on Slack:

I get easily confused in the morning. Also in the afternoon and evening.

Going viral on Telegram:

I called the cops on my own party once because I was ready to go to bed.

Making waves on WeChat:

To cut a long story short, I became a film editor.

Just landed via Reddit:

You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Spotted on Snapchat:

After my funeral, I want one of my friends to take my phone and text everyone, “Thanks for coming.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

How does a government that takes 40% of everyone’s money end up being trillions in debt?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

This is about the time of year where my enthusiasm about shoveling snow turns into “it will probably melt on it’s own”.

Hit my coworker with “you’re a lucky man” after I saw a picture of his wife just to let him know that I want to sleep with her.

At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

Used dark mode so much that I became physically repulsed when I see a white screen.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨