Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🤧💔 "Goodbye cruel world, for I have a cold and apparently that's the end of the line for me. Farewell, tissues and chicken soup, it's been real." 😂👋

am, cold, exaggeration, goodbye, guess, humor, i, illness, man, sadness

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I thought I had more straws. Sorry, turns out that was the last one.

0

2 months ago

apology, humor, i, last, last one, mistake, misunderstanding, sorry, straw, straws, thought
Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

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5 months ago

2, car, driving, gangsta’s, Gangsta’s Paradise, hand, hand position, hands, home, humor, listening, music, nostalgia, paradise, position, road, road safety, safety, song
Fifty shades of I miss you.

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2 months ago

fifty, humor, i, longing, love, miss, missing, missing someone, parody, pun, relationship, shades, someone, wordplay
People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

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4 weeks ago

advice, decision, heart, humor, irony, listen, people, right, right thing, same, say, thing, things
Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, clerk, context, decision, help, here, humor, i, liquor, need, store, yes
Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

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2 months ago

career, career change, change, humor, job, laziness, not working, passion, quitting, true, working

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on Slack this month:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

15 shares on X this month:

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

I want my boyfriend to be so hot strangers know he’s not funny.

71 shares on Snapchat this month:

Seeing a beautiful woman drink her beer is like witnessing an angel take flight.

27 shares on YouTube this month:

I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!

49 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand you’ve got hidden up your sleeve.

15 shares on TikTok this month:

Congratulations to the sweater, another year of being the most disgustingly named piece of clothing.

40 shares on Instagram this month:

My spirit animal is a sloth on its fourth nap of the day!

16 shares on WeChat this month:

The Epstein client list but to the tune of Mambo number 5.

56 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I don’t understand, “kill them with kindness”; can I use a lightsaber instead?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Nose so runny it just signed me up for a 10k.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

The lion does not concern himself with the check engine light.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Everybody looks sexier when they are happy.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Since there are no other Vulcans on the enterprise and the crew has no comparison, Spock could be and probably is bullshitting them most of the time.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Threads:

I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I’m so old, I used to block people by simply holding the door shut.

Just shared via Snapchat:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Seen just now on Twitch:

This whole week could have been an email.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I caught two kids smoking pot outside my office. Fifteen minutes later, my boss caught me and two kids smoking pot outside my office.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Don’t forget to set your clocks back to seasonal depression this weekend.

Making waves on Slack:

Living solo: where pants are optional, and snacks are unlimited.

Just landed via Twitch:

Due to foreseen circumstances well within my control I will be late.

Live now on Twitch:

Being excited to get in bed really is a different level of adulting.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My future husband is probably enjoying a nice summer with his first wife… but the seeds of discontent are there.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I am a man, a man with a cold, so I guess this is goodbye.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I thought I had more straws. Sorry, turns out that was the last one.

Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

Fifty shades of I miss you.

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨